Dance Doldrums

I kind-of-do and kind-of-don’t understand the concept of the joy of mediocrity.

If a mediocre-is-ok concept is for a person pursuing an activity that is totally a solo activity, well, fair enough. Or, I suppose if you pursue a partner/team activity and have a partner/teammates who are all similarly mediocre-is-ok minded, maybe that could work.

But if it’s a partner or team activity, and the partner/teammates DO strive for excellence and quality, then it seems, to me, that it’s unfair of the mediocre-minded participant to expect to jump in with them and very likely hold them back from their goals.

I mean, for me, I can get along dancing with a partner who makes mistakes, but who is actively making efforts to learn and improve. But I can’t get along dancing with someone who makes mistakes but who makes no effort to get better because the effort isn’t worth it to them, and they are OK with being mediocre. That person would be a drag on me.

I may very well be a mediocre dancer, but my “fun” comes from learning and trying to improve. I’m simply not going to have any “fun” with someone who does not share my try-to-improve mindset (and they likely will have no “fun” with me either).
I agree 100%. Problems arise when people aren’t clear or on the same page.
 
I have a serious case of dance doldrums. I cancelled my lesson yesterday, because I just don't feel like dancing right now. I have to take my next lesson because I am meeting a friend at the studio and planned the conversation just before my lesson. If I didn't have to meet them, I would cancel the next one too. I need to figure out my future. Dancing is just not fun right now and it is too expensive to continue when I am not enjoying the journey.
 
I have a serious case of dance doldrums. I cancelled my lesson yesterday, because I just don't feel like dancing right now. I have to take my next lesson because I am meeting a friend at the studio and planned the conversation just before my lesson. If I didn't have to meet them, I would cancel the next one too. I need to figure out my future. Dancing is just not fun right now and it is too expensive to continue when I am not enjoying the journey.
I think you have to figure out why it doesn't feel fun anymore. We started at a franchise studio to learn social dancing (salsa, WCS, 2-step, bachata, etc). Of course they wouldn't start with that and we were navigated to do rhythm and smooth. I lost interest in smooth and stopped doing it. While I still do rhythm at the franchise studio, my true joy at the moment is social dancing. I find it freeing and nobody is pressuring me to do an event. It's just the joy of dancing what I want, when I want, how I want. I just got tired of the constant events and pressure to pile on entries. I do like my franchise studio but the constant sales pitches get tiresome.
 
I have a serious case of dance doldrums. I cancelled my lesson yesterday, because I just don't feel like dancing right now. I have to take my next lesson because I am meeting a friend at the studio and planned the conversation just before my lesson. If I didn't have to meet them, I would cancel the next one too. I need to figure out my future. Dancing is just not fun right now and it is too expensive to continue when I am not enjoying the journey.
I hope a little time off gives you time to rest and reflect. Hope you find your way back to enjoying dancing when you're ready.
 
It’s been two weeks since my last lesson.
There are two more weeks till my next lesson.

I’m shocked that this thought has even crossed my mind, but I gotta say, it has been nice to have more time in my daily schedule to just live my life. For the last 4 years, my months and weeks and days and even hours have centered around ballroom dance lessons. My schedule has been controlled by the dates & times of my lessons (second after only the court’s hearing schedule). My budget has been monopolized by dance: lessons, showcases, mini matches, Fun Fridays, comps, dresses, shoes, fishnets, practice wear, jewelry, accessories, plane tickets, hotels…I mean, I could continue the list, but you guys already know what I’m talking about.

The last large lesson package I bought was in May - a mere 4 months ago. Due to doubling up with Pro & adding lessons with ProV, I have only about 18 prepaid lessons remaining. But because I only buy lessons when the studio offers its best discounts, I’m not planning to buy any more lessons until the end of November, which is when their holiday sale starts.

So…looks like I’ll be cutting back to seeing Pro only one (double) lesson per week at most. The thought of that doesn’t make me feel anxious; it makes me feel relieved. I will actually have time outside of lessons to process & practice what I’m learning - and maybe even do other things!

I think now I understand why studios don’t want their students taking long breaks like I’m doing this month.
 
It’s been two weeks since my last lesson.
There are two more weeks till my next lesson.

I’m shocked that this thought has even crossed my mind, but I gotta say, it has been nice to have more time in my daily schedule to just live my life. For the last 4 years, my months and weeks and days and even hours have centered around ballroom dance lessons. My schedule has been controlled by the dates & times of my lessons (second after only the court’s hearing schedule). My budget has been monopolized by dance: lessons, showcases, mini matches, Fun Fridays, comps, dresses, shoes, fishnets, practice wear, jewelry, accessories, plane tickets, hotels…I mean, I could continue the list, but you guys already know what I’m talking about.

The last large lesson package I bought was in May - a mere 4 months ago. Due to doubling up with Pro & adding lessons with ProV, I have only about 18 prepaid lessons remaining. But because I only buy lessons when the studio offers its best discounts, I’m not planning to buy any more lessons until the end of November, which is when their holiday sale starts.

So…looks like I’ll be cutting back to seeing Pro only one (double) lesson per week at most. The thought of that doesn’t make me feel anxious; it makes me feel relieved. I will actually have time outside of lessons to process & practice what I’m learning - and maybe even do other things!

I think now I understand why studios don’t want their students taking long breaks like I’m doing this month.
Not to mention not being in pain. Gee, this is what it's like for normal people.
 
I’m shocked that this thought has even crossed my mind, but I gotta say, it has been nice to have more time in my daily schedule to just live my life.
I recently cut back to one lesson per week and just focusing on WCS with some occasional social ballroom. I'm letting go of all my comp routines since at the last comp I enjoyed the wcs jack and jill WAY more than the pro/am comp portion with choreographed routines. My pro was great during the pro/am portion, but for me I just enjoy lead/follow & social so much more than choreo.

It's crazy how much more time and money I have in my week. I'm back to spending more time with the family and working out regularly and all the other things in my life that had been neglected due to the singular focus on dance. It had become such a grind to practice and do lessons for so many routines every week to keep them solid.

We'll see if this lasts, but right now I'm really enjoying it!
 
It’s been two weeks since my last lesson.
There are two more weeks till my next lesson.

I’m shocked that this thought has even crossed my mind, but I gotta say, it has been nice to have more time in my daily schedule to just live my life. For the last 4 years, my months and weeks and days and even hours have centered around ballroom dance lessons. My schedule has been controlled by the dates & times of my lessons (second after only the court’s hearing schedule). My budget has been monopolized by dance: lessons, showcases, mini matches, Fun Fridays, comps, dresses, shoes, fishnets, practice wear, jewelry, accessories, plane tickets, hotels…I mean, I could continue the list, but you guys already know what I’m talking about.

The last large lesson package I bought was in May - a mere 4 months ago. Due to doubling up with Pro & adding lessons with ProV, I have only about 18 prepaid lessons remaining. But because I only buy lessons when the studio offers its best discounts, I’m not planning to buy any more lessons until the end of November, which is when their holiday sale starts.

So…looks like I’ll be cutting back to seeing Pro only one (double) lesson per week at most. The thought of that doesn’t make me feel anxious; it makes me feel relieved. I will actually have time outside of lessons to process & practice what I’m learning - and maybe even do other things!

I think now I understand why studios don’t want their students taking long breaks like I’m doing this month.
Yep, when I quit many years ago I was amazed at the time and extra money I had. So for a long time I didn't even think about going back. There is just so much pressure to fit it all in when there is the rest of my life to enjoy. It does put it all in perspective.
 
It’s been two weeks since my last lesson.
There are two more weeks till my next lesson.

I’m shocked that this thought has even crossed my mind, but I gotta say, it has been nice to have more time in my daily schedule to just live my life. For the last 4 years, my months and weeks and days and even hours have centered around ballroom dance lessons. My schedule has been controlled by the dates & times of my lessons (second after only the court’s hearing schedule). My budget has been monopolized by dance: lessons, showcases, mini matches, Fun Fridays, comps, dresses, shoes, fishnets, practice wear, jewelry, accessories, plane tickets, hotels…I mean, I could continue the list, but you guys already know what I’m talking about.

The last large lesson package I bought was in May - a mere 4 months ago. Due to doubling up with Pro & adding lessons with ProV, I have only about 18 prepaid lessons remaining. But because I only buy lessons when the studio offers its best discounts, I’m not planning to buy any more lessons until the end of November, which is when their holiday sale starts.

So…looks like I’ll be cutting back to seeing Pro only one (double) lesson per week at most. The thought of that doesn’t make me feel anxious; it makes me feel relieved. I will actually have time outside of lessons to process & practice what I’m learning - and maybe even do other things!

I think now I understand why studios don’t want their students taking long breaks like I’m doing this month.
I think I have mentioned this before: the current C Latin Champion in Open Gold sees her Pro once a month. Outside of that, she practices a lot.

Me, I can't be without dancing. The one day off I force myself to take I spend with watching dance videos. If I took my job half as seriously as dancing, I wouldn't be perceived by my colleagues as an unreliable slacker (and I'm only slightly exaggerating). I just love ballroom more than anything, with the exception of my kids. I mean, I would give up all my favorite dishes AND sex before I would give up dancing. Which is sort of scary.

But I'm perfectly fine with having only two lessons per week with my Pro. I would prefer more, but I'm okay with two. I just practice every day. My point is, if you find lessons and comps and showcases too stressful, don't do them! Just practice, with that one lesson per week, and no commitments to any kind of comp or showcase. Many good things will happen: you will save money, you find out if you really want/need dancing in your life, and you will become a better dancer!

You simply cannot go wrong with that plan.

And don't feel bad about being okay without dancing for now (or for any length of time). Just accept your experience and make the most of it.
 
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To avoid the dance doldrums, I refuse to teach advanced steps to someone who is not ready for them
THAT. The only time in my life when I wasn't excited about dancing was when my then-Pro (all of 18 years old) decided that we should skip Silver and move from Closed Bronze to Open Gold after less than a year of dancing. I loved Bronze (and not just because I was winning. I enjoyed my body moving to the specifics of ballroom, I loved the technique of it), but Open Gold was awful. I didn't belong there, and I knew it. I couldn't move properly, I struggled with the choreography, and I hated the experience! When I got back to dancing again, I danced a little Bronze again (didn't compete in it, but we danced it a bit), and then entered Closed Silver, which really was my level. I've been happy since.
 
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And don't feel bad about being okay without dancing for now (or for any length of time).
Good Lord! I don’t at all feel bad about enjoying this break, nor do I have any intention of giving up lessons or comps!!! I was simply surprised by my own reaction. I thought I’d be suffering withdrawal symptoms (like the shakes) by now, lol.

I didn’t realize what a difference there would be in my reaction to an involuntary break (e.g., caused by getting a giant splinter in my foot from the brand new ballroom floor *koff koff*) vs my reaction to a voluntary break.

Despite all the personal & work-related crap going on in my life this month, I still could have fit in a couple of lessons here and there. But as I said before, I don’t want dance to be something that only gets “fit in” around other stuff.
 
THAT. The only time in my life when I wasn't excited about dancing was when my then-Pro (all of 18 years old) decided that we should skip Silver and move from Closed Bronze to Open Gold after less than a year of dancing. I loved Bronze (and not just because I was winning. I enjoyed my body moving to the specifics of ballroom, I loved the technique of it), but Open Gold was awful. I didn't belong there, and I knew it. I couldn't move properly, I struggled with the choreography, and I hated the experience! When I got back to dancing again, I danced a little Bronze again (didn't compete in it, but we danced it a bit), and then entered Closed Silver, which really was my level. I've been happy since.
There was a time when I was a little blind about the importance of the basics too (even as a teacher), but I think I have grown wiser with age. :)
 
I recently cut back to one lesson per week and just focusing on WCS with some occasional social ballroom. I'm letting go of all my comp routines since at the last comp I enjoyed the wcs jack and jill WAY more than the pro/am comp portion with choreographed routines. My pro was great during the pro/am portion, but for me I just enjoy lead/follow & social so much more than choreo.

It's crazy how much more time and money I have in my week. I'm back to spending more time with the family and working out regularly and all the other things in my life that had been neglected due to the singular focus on dance. It had become such a grind to practice and do lessons for so many routines every week to keep them solid.

We'll see if this lasts, but right now I'm really enjoying it!
Wow, I could have written this. Really into WCS lately (and I do love my Latin social dances as well). I feel like I come out of a workshop or lesson with something new and fresh every time that elevates my WCS. Plus, it's just a very free feeling dance. I still do ballroom but not as much, and I don't miss the events.
 

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