Dancing when you have Kids

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pygmalion

Well-Known Member
Other than DancingMommy (and ShyDancer's sister, vicariously) I don't know a single serious dancer with preschool aged kids. I know a few dance students with older kids, but not many. And I know a couple dance teachers who have spouses to take care of the kids, but again, not many. I'm guessing everyody's too busy to commit to the dance and their kids at the same time. I guess ...

Any thoughts on dancing and kids? Do you have any yourself, or know folks who do but manage to dance anyway? HOw does one work that balance?
 
I don't have children, but I did have a dance instructor a few years ago who had a little girl, I think she was about 6 or 7. He would bring her to the studio with him and everyone thought she was just adorable. He had taught her to do a few latin steps and would sometimes dance with her during studio parties. I wish I could see them now, she has to be a teenager or near there. I wonder if she developed the "my dad is so lame" attitude so many kids develop, or whether they remained close because she grew up dancing with him.

Christina
 
pygmalion said:
Any thoughts on dancing and kids? Do you have any yourself, or know folks who do but manage to dance anyway? HOw does one work that balance?
Click to expand...

I started dancing because my exwife moved across the country with our daughter and I needed something to fill the void left behind. My daughter and I are doing much better since we've been living near each other again, but her mother rarely lets her stay overnight with me so I still have lots of free evening to dance.

There is one local couple who have been dancing for a long time, and thier two daughters are great dancers as well. The used to leave the youngest one home (despite her begging to go as well), but one night they couldn't get a sitter and let her attend as well. They've been dancing as a family ever since.

I've brought my 12 year old daughter to a couple USABDA dances, and she seems to enjoy herself. She doesn't dance yet, but she enjoys interacting with the people, so that's a step in the right direction. Last month she even asked if we were attending this month, so that's even better!

As far as how one reaches a balance between dancing and family, it's like everything else, constant adjustment.

Kevin
 
I have a 2 year old daughter, and am lucky enough to have a spouse that's (semi)supportive of my dancing, so he has her most of the 4 days a week that I dance. My dancing is not yet full time, so we have to just work schedules around however we can. Once I am teaching full-time (if I can get up the nerve!) I plan on having her at the studio with me a lot, especially since she has expressed an interest in dancing herself. She has actually been to a training session with me...but at her age NOW, she does get a bit impatient....

Did I actually answer that question...or just ramble?? :lol:
 
I have 2 pre-schoolers :D a 4 yr old son and 3 yr old daughter.
Im only dancing 2 nights a week though so it doesnt interfere with them at all really.... they either stay with their dad or my parents if their dad is playing basketball.

I dont know if I would classify myself as a serious dancer though..... I do LOVE it and think about dancing most of the day, dance around at home all the time but apart from that its just my 2 classes and a private lesson a week.
Once I finish my current medal classes Im considering starting my bronze medals in modern and NV.
I will have to think about that more carefully when the time comes though!
 
A good friend of mine at dancing has three kids under 10. She and her husband have split in the last few months, and she is finding it a lot harder to keep up classes. Having to work it in around when the kids are at school, a new job she has had to take, or when her husband has the kids every other weekend. It's frustrating to her, but she accepts it as just the way life is for her at the moment.

Other people at dancing have kids, it's not an unusual occurrence. My instructor has two under 4.
 
Maybe it's different in the US than in other countries around the world. People here, as a rule, take dancing a lot less seriously. Meaning -- ballroom dance in the US is a social pursuit for many, and a serious sport for relatively few. In other countries around the world, the number of people taking dance seriously as a sport is much higher. There's nothing unusual about a serious athlete having young children and pursuing sports excellence. But it's pretty unusual for people to leave their young children at home so that they can pursue a hobby, however engrossing. People wait a year or two. Maybe that's why you and I see see different things.
 
My tango teachers bring their baby boy along to lessons. He's in an adjacent room with a baby monitor (if asleep) and he has sat on my knee a few times during the class. All depends on the atmosphere and the venue I guess. When they're a little older and can move it gets more complicated.
 
I can't speak from experience, as I'm not married and don't have children. But I would expect dancing to go way down on the priority list after my wife and I have children, because I want to be able to devote more than enough time to being with them while they are young. You know, I don't want to dance those special years away! After the children grow up though, if the interest to get more into dancing again is there, I can foresee us making time to get out and learn more and get out and dance together once again.

One example of a "Married with Children" dance couple I can speak briefly about is my dance instructor. Her and her husband both teach dance. They had 2 children, who are grown up now, married, and they each teach dance in different cities. Have their own studio and are quite successful! So, viewed in a narrow way like that, I would consider that a success story!

pygmalion said:
Maybe it's different in the US than in other countries around the world. People here, as a rule, take dancing a lot less seriously.
Click to expand...

Good point, Pygmalion. As always, your insight is very insightful!
 
Pygmalion is right on with that observation. When you think of the world of sports, nobody thinks twice about continuing on after they have kids. Both top pro athletes like Lance Armstrong and amateurs just keep going, recognizing that the kids have to accept this as part of life. But in the dance world, so many people stop when the kids come along. Makes sense if it's just a social activity, but for those who are serious about it there should be no reason to stop.
 
Simply a matter how important dancing is, I guess. There are quite a few family orientated dances which could be useful for those generalists who love to dance and want to spend time with their children. :)
 
Well, all I can say is that the more you have, the harder it gets, lol!

Gabriella is almost 2 and rambunctious, so we can't take her *anywhere* where we can't keep our hands on her. When she was smaller, she would stay strapped in her carseat and be happy for an hour or so OR if we were lucky she'd sleep through our lessons. :)

Anabella is 4 weeks old and we could take her to lessons with us, but Gab would have to stay with my folks. Since I'm exclusively breastfeeding, it's hard to take Anabella anywhere that there isn't a nice "private" area to feed her. Don't even get me started on using the restroom as a lunch-room... If I wouldn't eat there, my darling baby isn't either, LOL!

We pretty much confine ourselves to going out to the USABDA dance once a month sue to schedules, etc. I have a feeling that when Gab is older, it will be MUCH easier to go out with her.

FWIW, we rarely go *anywhere* without the kids. They are like American Express - you don't leave home without them...
 
That's what I've heard. One kid is fun; two is work. Good luck, DM. And let me know if you need me to hold the baby while you two dance. :wink:
 
Any dancers with small children?

Hi !

My son is almost 1 year old now and I've been thinking lately how much i miss dancing. I'm considering trying to start practicing 1-2 times per week after his bedtime -- and not just by myself in the kitchen (which is so not big enough for standard anyway!).

Anyone here have small children and can share their experience with figuring out how to dance and also be a good parent? How/when do you schedule practice, who watches your child/(ren), what trade offs do you make? What worked, what didn't work?

I know there's no one way, it'll depend on what level of competitive dance you want, what your support at home is like....but I'd love to hear any and all thoughts on the subject!

smileabit
:friend:
 
I have a daughter 26 months and a son 12 months. My wife and I never gave up dancing; we just took the kids along. Granted we spend as much time sitting with the kids as dancing, but sometimes they fall asleep, sometimes they're willing to watch quietly, and sometimes we dance with them.

Edit: a side benefit is that my daughter is now very interested in ballroom, and hopefully my son soon will be too.
 
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