Fighting Snark with Snark: Your Snarkiest Comebacks

twnkltoz

twnkltoz

Forum Master
I got this idea from the "unhealthy dance instructors" thread. Do you ever get blown away by stupid remarks like "don't bother, it won't work?" Do you ever wish you had the perfect comeback line to "Did you know cigarettes cause cancer?"

Let's armour ourselves against evil! Fight snark with snark! Give us your best comeback lines, so never again will we wake up in the middle of the night with the perfect line that we SHOULD have said! Charge!!
 
Here's one I've been DYING to use:

"Amazing, there's actually a dance floor big enough to contain your ego!"
 
I've menttioned this one before here . . .

In my early days, when I'd approach a lady and ask her to dance . . . if she said "no" . . . my comeback was . . . "Why are you being so picky? I wasn't!"
 
Well for me to have comebacks ready I need some ppl to throw some insults at me. So whats the meanest thing someone has ever said to you?
 
Vince A wrote: "I've menttioned this one before here . . .

In my early days, when I'd approach a lady and ask her to dance . . . if she said "no" . . . my comeback was . . . "Why are you being so picky? I wasn't!"

I got turned down when asking a stranger last Friday to dance a hustle. She mentioned she didn't really do hustle, which I replied with an ok, and then proceeded to ask someone else. But, what I perhaps could have said was something like, "If I ask you again to dance is there a style that would be more preferable?"

I realize this is a tad off the topic, but any other ideas folks?
 
I have never had anything nasty said to me. Except when we were out one night with a few of the instructors at an inner city bar. The owner of the studio got me up for a salsa, asking me if I could or not. I replied that I could, though very badly. Within a few bars of music he looked at me with a wry smile on his face and said "You're right!". :twisted:

Next lesson he had with me we had a warmup salsa, even though it is not in the syllabus that I was there to learn for that lesson. Lack of practice, that's all!

DP - I'd hustle with you, even though I don't really know how. One of those things I've learnt on the fly, not really knowing what I'm doing, but I'll give it a go!! :D
 
I remember one! I remember one!! :bouncy:

When I started doing groups, there was one guy who had been doing these groups for ages, I'm talking 2 years or more!

We had just learnt a new step and we changed partners. He said to me "Let's see what we can do with you!". As if he was Mr Perfect! I didn't say anything to him but then he actually stuffed up the step. I just said to him "what was that?" which got a bit of a giggle from the instructor because she knew what he was like.
 
I can't really do comebacks. I just sound bitter. Best I can do is refuse whatever it is in a straight voice.

Of course, 'your momma' is a general, all purpose comeback that has withstood the test of time. :wink:
 
I do comebacks. Good at them. In many languages. People who make snide, egotistical remarks need a taste of their own medicine. My favorite comeback, while not a reply to an insult, was made by Steve Martin-

guy about to light up a cigarette "Mind if I smoke?"

Steve Martin "No. Mind if I fart?"
 
Ok, this lady that I've known for a long time approached me one night at a dance. I had been on Body For Life, a great diet/exercise plan, and had been losing weight. She said, "Jennifer, you gain and lose weight more than anyone I know." she said it with a smile, but I didn't find it very amusing.

Ok, what's your line?
 
"Well the process is so fun why would anyone settle for doing it only once?"

Or

"Well I have so many clothes in so many different sizes it would be a shame not to get to wear them all"

You need to channel Paris Hiltons flippant attitudes for the best comebacks

"thats hot"
 
i really wouldn't bother beyond taking note of it in the back of my head for future reference.. if/when required.. and keep on with my jive like it aint happened.. unless of course they were rude.. in which case.. ehem.. well :twisted: .. u just shouldn't mess with a scorpio like that :wink:
 
cocodrilo said:
I do comebacks. Good at them. In many languages. People who make snide, egotistical remarks need a taste of their own medicine. My favorite comeback, while not a reply to an insult, was made by Steve Martin-

guy about to light up a cigarette "Mind if I smoke?"

Steve Martin "No. Mind if I fart?"
Click to expand...

classic... i gotta remember that one. :D
 
twnkltoz said:
Ok, this lady that I've known for a long time approached me one night at a dance. I had been on Body For Life, a great diet/exercise plan, and had been losing weight. She said, "Jennifer, you gain and lose weight more than anyone I know." she said it with a smile, but I didn't find it very amusing.

Ok, what's your line?
Click to expand...
I would have said - "Why don't you look behind yourself, you'd find what I lost!"
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Dance Ads

Advertise on Dance Forums Reach dancers, teachers, studios, event organizers, and dance-friendly brands. View ad options
Back
Top