Misspendragon
Forum Master
It has been a year that I posted anything here, simply because I spent most of 2024 off the dance floor. My younger sister's health in Hungary deteriorated to the extent that she went straight from the hospital to the hospice, dying not only of advanced Multiple Schlerosis but also cancer (breast, bone, and brain), and I was neither emotionally nor financially in a place to dance. After I returned from Hungary at the end of October we decided with Pro to attend Holiday, despite me being not ready at all, because I felt that if I don't finish the year with dancing, I may never dance again. With my incredible Pro's unfailing support, we got ready for Holiday in less than two months (I was still memorizing Samba a week before the comp), and off to Vegas we went.
The experience of dancing there was beyond educational. I was out of shape, physically and mentally, so I had to swallow my pride and grow nearly overnight, learn self-acceptance in ways I would have never thought in the past necessary. I was 15 pounds overweight and athletically inferior - those of you who know me even just a little, I don't have to explain how difficult was that for me to accept - and I was dancing not in closed silver anymore but closed gold, which attracts only technique-oriented dancers, as people dancing for mostly fun tend to go right to open and skip closed gold. I was dancing with a Pro I never danced at a comp before, and I barely knew my routines.
Knowing all this, it was not possible for me to walk onto the floor as if I owned it. So, how was I supposed to walk onto the floor???
And then, a miraculous thing happened. Although I did my best (at least in the scholarship. In the singles I was still finding myself and my partner, figuring out how to connect to us and the floor), I felt not more but less tired than usually. I connected with both my Pro and myself better, heck I even connected sometimes with the audience, and I felt way less stressed than in the past. I didn't expect to place well, but I nearly won, placing second because of Rule 11, and I walked away from the floor energized and happy - the last thing I expected.
My Pro was happy with me too, even if we have our work cut out for us, especially if we want to move up to open. His explanation for being less tired than two years ago even though I'm much less fit? "Better technique and connection." And looking at the videos, I'm happy to say that I did improve some since my last comp. Not as much as I could have with more work, obviously, but I think I'm on the right track.
The experience of dancing there was beyond educational. I was out of shape, physically and mentally, so I had to swallow my pride and grow nearly overnight, learn self-acceptance in ways I would have never thought in the past necessary. I was 15 pounds overweight and athletically inferior - those of you who know me even just a little, I don't have to explain how difficult was that for me to accept - and I was dancing not in closed silver anymore but closed gold, which attracts only technique-oriented dancers, as people dancing for mostly fun tend to go right to open and skip closed gold. I was dancing with a Pro I never danced at a comp before, and I barely knew my routines.
Knowing all this, it was not possible for me to walk onto the floor as if I owned it. So, how was I supposed to walk onto the floor???
And then, a miraculous thing happened. Although I did my best (at least in the scholarship. In the singles I was still finding myself and my partner, figuring out how to connect to us and the floor), I felt not more but less tired than usually. I connected with both my Pro and myself better, heck I even connected sometimes with the audience, and I felt way less stressed than in the past. I didn't expect to place well, but I nearly won, placing second because of Rule 11, and I walked away from the floor energized and happy - the last thing I expected.
My Pro was happy with me too, even if we have our work cut out for us, especially if we want to move up to open. His explanation for being less tired than two years ago even though I'm much less fit? "Better technique and connection." And looking at the videos, I'm happy to say that I did improve some since my last comp. Not as much as I could have with more work, obviously, but I think I'm on the right track.
