Follower's frame

[Zoopsia59]

The real trick is to be able to detect and adapt to various partner preferences.

(and maybe some day I'll get good at it)

Yes... I should have added that. But the important things that the OP realize that when one leader says she's too this and another says she's too that (the opposite) it doesn't mean she's wrong and needs to make a global change or get confused. She will need to learn to adjust to different partners, but I wouldn't expect a beginner to be able to do that just yet.

Right now the important thing is she not take these things too much to heart and let everything each leader says determine her overall technique or she'll never get ANYWHERE! She'll be too busy constantly adjusting to please people who should be at least partly also adjusting to her.

Adjusting to various partners is one thing. But we all know people out there who simply want every person they dance with to be the perfect partner for THEM so THEY don't have to make an adjustments themselves. And they make sure to tell their partners what they need to change to be the perfect partner for them regardless of whether their suggestions would ever apply to anyone else or be detrimental to the other person's technique.

Compensating at expense of your own technique isn't "adjusting for variations of preference." But we've all been asked (directly or indirectly) to do at some point that under the guise of "adjusting to various partners".

 

[yogi5941]

Interesting advice Zoopsia- I've experienced that problem at ballroom socials. The challenge of getting used to different leaders is really interesting. I guess we all inevitably find our favorite people to dance with.

I will try to keep all of this in mind

 

[tangonuevo]

...
I will try to keep all of this in mind

I view the connection as led, and hence I suggest that you try to match your partner's frame. If you are dancing with a lead who maintains a fairly strong frame, the chances are that he expects to "drive" you around the floor. This is very sorta like close embrace where the connection is torso to torso and you sense, and can react, to every movement of the lead.

On the other hand, if your partner offers you a softer frame, go with it, but don't be a noodle! One common problem in open is that occasionally a lead may relax the frame entirely so that he may move without conveying any lead intention to the follow. If you are too stiff, you will interpret his motion as a lead even though it was not one.

In a given dance with an experienced follow my frame (embrace) may vary from closed to open and firm to open and loose. Again, if you view the tension in the frame as being led, you will (generally) not go wrong.