Follows dancing every dance

[rails]

I've got a question for the follows. How do you feel about ending a dance and while you're still out on the floor, perhaps before even taking a single step off of it, another lead appears in front of you to ask for a dance? What if this happens all night?

In lead-heavy scenes like mine, you often have to nab a follow this quickly if you ever want a chance to dance with her. I do it sometimes, but feel kind of rude about it when I do. Should I?

P.S. It's not this bad most nights, but sometimes it is.

 

[Laura]

I wish things like that would happen to me!!! You say you are in San Francisco -- so am I -- what style are you dancing and where are you dancing it because I don't consider San Francisco to be lead-heavy for ballroom parties.

 

[rails]

I wish things like that would happen to me!!! You say you are in San Francisco -- so am I -- what style are you dancing and where are you dancing it because I don't consider San Francisco to be lead-heavy for ballroom parties.

I'm not familiar with the ballroom scene. I do lindy hop and salsa where this kind of thing happens a little too often. It was like that last Sunday at Allegro, for example, which prompted me to ask the question here.

 

[MacMoto]

Same as Laura here -- rails, you are describing my dream night! There are times when I have to tell the guy to wait for a moment while I run to the table to have a quick drink of water before I can dance with him, but since I don't need a lot of rest between dances, I don't mind guys queuing up to grab me at all! :lol: It always feels nice to be in demand :wink:.

Note to self: Go to San Francisco for non-stop salsa.

 

[squirrel]

Wow! Nice! I gotta go there!

Our scene is follow-heavy... not to the same extent as you complain, rails... but still

Maybe you can come to Bucharest...

 

[Swingolder]

I have a different kind of problem. I dance with my husband and we dance just about every dance together. I think we dance too much together and not enough with others but he (my husband) says he prefers to dance with me. Well, I like dancing with others now and then but there isn't much chance since we are such a "couple". And if I do get in a dance with someone else, he will patiently sit and wait instead of asking another gal to dance. He doesn't mind my dancing with others, he just doesn't want to. I really appreciate him taking up dancing (and actually it was his idea!), most of my friends can't get their husband, boyfriends, etc. to even think about dance or dance lessons.

And I really like dancing with him so I guess it is not really a problem, just a comment.

 

[sunderi]

I've got a question for the follows. How do you feel about ending a dance and while you're still out on the floor, perhaps before even taking a single step off of it, another lead appears in front of you to ask for a dance? What if this happens all night?

I know it wouldn't bother me at all as long as it wasn't the same guy over & over again. I hate it when one person tries to monopolize me all night! In other words, after someone has danced with me 3-4 times in an evening, I'd prefer if they waited for me to ask them for the next one -- that way, if I don't enjoy them as a partner, it doesn't get to be too much.

Also, the guy asking should be very understanding (and not take it personally!) if the woman wants a break every so often.

 

[MacMoto]

I have a different kind of problem. I dance with my husband and we dance just about every dance together. I think we dance too much together and not enough with others

I think there's an old thread where couples' dancing preferences were discussed: some preferring to stick to each other (like your husband) and others dancing with everyone else. I'll dig and see if I can find it.

Well, I like dancing with others now and then but there isn't much chance since we are such a "couple".

This is the main reason I don't like to be "hogged" by a leader -- people assume that YOU don't want to dance with other guys :shock:. When you are in that situation, the only way to remedy it is for you to ask guys instead of waiting for other guys to ask you... which is a bit of a pain. Then again, at least you don't have that "oh, my favourite song! -- and there are no guys available to dance with :cry:" problem I'm all too familiar with (common in a follow-heavy scene).

I really appreciate him taking up dancing (and actually it was his idea!),

So he took up dancing really just to dance with you... that's so sweet .

 

[Swingolder]

So he took up dancing really just to dance with you... that's so sweet .

Yes he did and yes he is really sweet! Neither one of us had danced much and he thought it would be something we could do together. So we started lessons and are having a heck of a good time.

 

[Asiatias]

This is a hard one to help you with...... we all dream of "lead-heavy scenes "

I know as a female I go around and grab the guys so I can get as many dances in as I can....lol...I am not shy!

But I do wait till the man is no longer with the last partner......

(maybe because I am suppose to wait for them to ask)

 

[Patapouf]

For me it depends on my energy level. There are times that my energy level is so high that I don't mind dancing dance after dance. In fact, one night I did this for at least 4 hrs non-stop because for some reason the scene was lead-heavy that night, and they were desperate to get some ladies to dance with! I even did 3-4 dances with the some of them in a row!

When my energy level is low, that's a different story. Until a certain point I'd probably say yes, but once I crossed that line I'd start turning people down, and I did exactly that one night, turning most people down but just sat and watched.

But on an average night, I generally don't mind doing dance after dance since I don't need that much break in between dances, I actually enjoy that! Like McMoto, sometimes I have to run to get some water real quick but generally it feels nice to be in demand! :wink:

 

[TheLetterJ]

On a related question. How many songs do you follows prefer to wait before dancing with the same lead again? I'm a lead, and I always thought that I should let a follow dance with others for a bit just so they don't get bored with the moves I do. (I know a moderate number of moves, not a whole lot, since I'm concentrating on putting more style and playing with the moves I know right now).

Maybe it's just a lead's point of view, but since we do the same moves with most of the people we dance, it can seem repetitive to us at least. Whereas as follows get to dance with different people who have different moves.

 

[Asiatias]

So he took up dancing really just to dance with you... that's so sweet .

Yes he did and yes he is really sweet! Neither one of us had danced much and he thought it would be something we could do together. So we started lessons and are having a heck of a good time.

I agree!

 

[Sagitta]

I would guess that it also depends on what songs are being played. I have had latin nights where I start dancing with someone and first a bachata plays, then a merengue, then a salsa. Now this is a different situation from when you dance three salsa songs in a row with a person.

 

[twnkltoz]

Rarely have I ever been asked as I was finishing a dance. In fact, I rarely get asked at all besides my partner! It wouldn't bother me in the slightest. I'm a big girl...I can decline politely if I'm too tired, or ask for a moment to get a drink.