How do you and your partner make plans and goals?

[s2k]

So there's lots to consider in planning and goal setting:

• lessons and training (on the floor)
• training (outside the ballroom - yoga, pilates, barre, strength training, etc)
• outside coaching - who to see?
• which comps to do
• which workshops to do
• which dances to overhaul
• which dances to polish up (technique, light/shade, connection, etc)

How do you and your partner go about making these decisions? Do you base them off your feelings, videos, your coach's input, recent judges' marks?

Do you give yourselves a particular time frame in meeting certain goals?

What outside resources do you use to help you meet your goals (like books, workshops, etc).

What goals have you set for yourselves in the past? And how did you meet them?

 

[tangotime]

Do you give yourselves a particular time frame in meeting certain goals?

This was part of Scriveners "mantra"..

 

[Dr Dance]

How do you and your partner go about making these decisions?

My partner and I negotiate by discussing our goals openly, honestly, and supportively. Although our goals do not precisely match, we both strive to attain the sights with which we do share. And for those we don't, we simply agree to disagree. The partnership has been mutually beneficial.

 

[s2k]

This was part of Scriveners "mantra"..

So... you would prefer not to have a particular time in which to meet a goal?

 

[Dance Redeemer]

So... you would prefer not to have a particular time in which to meet a goal?

Actually, depending on the goal, I would prefer not to have a particular time established in which I "need" to meet the goal. Setting a "due by" date works well with me for some goals where I feel I'm likely to be able to meet/control the outcome (e.g., the amount of practices and lessons, the number of showcases or coachings or competitions, or the number of dances to review/change). But other goals, where it's more tenuous, I prefer not to have a fixed timeline for. For example, I am currently working on trying to improve my Fall Away in Foxtrot. I have a goal or vision in mind that I am trying to achieve as a "next step", but I don't know if it will take 3 months, 6 months, a year or more to achieve (although I suspect more than a year ). I work on it a certain amount of time in lessons and in practice each week/month, and that is what I measure and control. But I cannot control how quickly my body will consume the training/lessons or how quickly it will get ingested in muscle memory. When I have tried to set timelines for that type of skill-oriented goal, I get very frustrated and demotivated when I miss the time / date. So I no longer set them.

 

[MaggieMoves]

How do you and your partner go about making these decisions? Do you base them off your feelings, videos, your coach's input, recent judges' marks?

We usually have lunch over it, and it's a combination of feelings/coaches/judges input. It really depends on what we're doing though. A good example of something outside of this would be a small showcase - did people enjoy it or not?

Do you give yourselves a particular time frame in meeting certain goals?

Absolutely, and it's a huge stress point I find between past and current partners alike. I'm generally very goal and analytically oriented... which can work against me if I over think things a bit too much.

What goals have you set for yourselves in the past? And how did you meet them?

One in the past I've set... and I know I might step on some toes here with this: Was for an ex partner to lose some weight. He had a lot of potential and was an athlete in college. He was a good 30-40 lbs overweight though which affected our ability to compete. He ultimately moved back into the social scene.

Learned to set little goals first instead of big ones on a touchy subject like that. Knock out the bricks before you take down the wall.

 

[Mr 4 styles]

Hardest lesson I have learned in dancing the last 13 years..... Don't chase judges marks. It's futile and discouraging Chase goals.... use video evidence of improvement as reinforcement ... technique over choreography all day

 

[Dancing Irishman]

One in the past I've set... and I know I might step on some toes here with this: Was for an ex partner to lose some weight. He had a lot of potential and was an athlete in college. He was a good 30-40 lbs overweight though which affected our ability to compete. He ultimately moved back into the social scene.

Learned to set little goals first instead of big ones on a touchy subject like that. Knock out the bricks before you take down the wall.

Definitely better to build up a rapport with a new partner before announcing that goal. I also would probably let a coach (ideally visiting) plant that seed and make it clear I was ready to support my partner as much as they needed on their journey, but wouldn't call it a partnership "goal" since I wouldn't be able to exert any direct influence over achieving it.

 

[Loki]

Whoever rolls onto their back and displays their throat loses.

Depends. Some things can be handled using project management and others are more nebulous IME.

There's also a balance between positive stress and teeth grinding.

Input comes from multiple sources - again, balance is key IMO.

 

[Joe]

There's also a balance between positive stress and teeth gnashing.

FTFY