How do you part with difficult studio/coach gracefully ?

D

dancingirldancing

Member
Me and DP are thinking about permanently moving from our current studio to coach at a different studio.

However as we were taking a lot of lessons this will decrease their revenue significantly. We have not been feeling like we are getting much value for our money in this studio due to coach competency and willingness to give information.

We have been trying different studios and found the one that we like best and work out for us in term of coach and location.

The problem with the current studio is that the owner have been known to be difficult and greedy. He will be terribly unhappy with our decision and make a lot of fuss. I can just picture the commotion that will ensue if we tell him honestly of the situation.

The dissatisfaction that we are feeling have been built up for many years. We always feels that their decision is based on how much money they can make from us rather than our best interest.

They also try to control out personal live to a degree that is highly inappropiate not to mention constantly ignoring our wishes in regards to the direction we want to take with our dancing.

How should we approach this difficult situation ?

I really do not wish to have nasty confrontation as I do not think that it is necessary.

On the other hand, this is what will happen if we are forthcoming and tell him the truth.
 
This sounds so familiar. I was recently in the same situation, contemplating how to move on. In my case it took losing my job, which obviously everyone at the studio understood why I couldn't continue lessons!

You and DP should go to him/her together and tell them that you have come to a decision to leave the studio because you both feel it is the best thing for your dancing and your partnership. You don't have to get in to reasons, but just that you have decided to explore a different option to see if it's a better fit.
 
If this guy is already known to be "difficult and greedy", then any stink he raises about you two leaving the studio will not reflect badly on you at all. I realize you're trying to avoid an ugly situation, but I think you already know it's best that you break it off. All you can do is try to take the high road, and if he doesn't follow suit it will only hurt his business even more.
 
Agree with WW. State the you and DP are exploring options that would be best for your dancing, without getting into details. I recommend doing in person, do not use email, for example.
 
Just say you're going elsewhere. There's no need to create drama. If they do, well then that's why you're leaving. But no reason to make up stories or even tell them the exact whys of you leaving. Just say you're leaving.
 
dancingirldancing said:
He will be terribly unhappy with our decision and make a lot of fuss. I can just picture the commotion that will ensue if we tell him honestly of the situation.

The dissatisfaction that we are feeling have been built up for many years. We always feels that their decision is based on how much money they can make from us rather than our best interest.

They also try to control out personal live to a degree that is highly inappropiate not to mention constantly ignoring our wishes in regards to the direction we want to take with our dancing.

How should we approach this difficult situation ?

I really do not wish to have nasty confrontation as I do not think that it is necessary.

On the other hand, this is what will happen if we are forthcoming and tell him the truth.
Click to expand...
you have no obligation to tell or not to tell...they may indeed become upset and make a fuss if you give them candid feedback. then again...after the upset subsides, it might catalyze them to adjust their behavior, and they may be appreciative for your candor. or not... you have no way of knowing, and it's not really your concern, it's their choice & responsibility how they respond.

but telling (respectfully, and as kindly as possible) is, to my mind, an honest way to bring closure to what sounds like has been a long-term relationship. the truth is the truth...it's good to not be afraid of it.

then again...if you know it's opening up a can of drama that you sense really wouldn't be productive, you could simply say you've found a situation that suits you better at this point and leave it at that.

follow your instincts...
 
Yes I understand that and staying will drive me insane. I am still not looking forward to the day though ....

Should I tell them where I am going to move to ?

The thing is they are very probing and invasive and probably will try to interrogate me !
 
dancingirldancing said:
Yes I understand that and staying will drive me insane. I am still not looking forward to the day though ....

Should I tell them where I am going to move to ?

The thing is they are very probing and invasive and probably will try to interrogate me !
Click to expand...

"for the moment, we're solidifying our plans and would like to keep them private... we'll be happy to make them public later."
 
That is a great line Samina !

The main problem with my coach is that he knows that both me and my DP are very gentle and non confrontational person and he is literally bullying us into doing things that benefits him.

I am sure he will try to bully us into staying ....
 
If you throw your shoes across ballroom and break one of the mirrors they'll actually ask you to leave. That way you won't have to worry about being pressured to stay. :)
 
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