Lured to the Darkside - Again

A

Albanaich

New Member
Just been lured to the darkside - again.

Why does this happen to me?

Out dancing Salsa with a very attractive blonde doctor and conversation goes, something like, you're wasted doing this, you've got really good rhythm, and are really quick for someone so old (those exact words!) I need someone like you to help me, I think I could get you up to bronze in ballroom very quickly. . . . .

So there it is a 20 something has asked me to be her ballroom partner. It's relief in the sense that she's not a teeny. . . but I'm back to ballroom again.

There's this awful fascination.

a) I'm a sucker when it comes to attractive young women asking me to be their partner

b) I have this love hate relationship with ballroom, I always feel like understanding it is about a millimetre further on from where I'm at - but I can never travel that millimetre.

c) Why are they all doctors or from the medical professions? Why do they want to save me from being an 'undisciplined' dancer.

d) When do you actually get to enjoy ballroom instead of it being an infuriating puzzle you have to beat.
 
Albanaich said:
Just been lured to the darkside - again.

d) When do you actually get to enjoy ballroom instead of it being an infuriating puzzle you have to beat.
Click to expand...

(Partly I like the puzzle -- most of the time.)

For me, this goes in phases. I think of ballroom problems as "hard but brittle". I spend time banging my head against some issue. I give it a lot of practice. It gets frustrating. Eventually, in the midst of working on it, at some unpredictable moment, something goes 'click', and I get it. My dancing feels so much better; there's this great feeling of having solved something. Great! What fun! Then, as it turns out, what's really happened, see, is I had this other problem I never realized before, because the first one was in the way...

Lather, rinse, repeat.

That "millimetre away" feeling is in a sense there, then, at every plateau.

However, with time, work, patience, and experience, that process becomes more and more manageable.

So, every problem is only hard... until it isn't.

Also, every 'click' comes with greater dancing facility, and there's plenty of enjoyment (for me) in making use of hard-earned skills.

(Does that help?)

And yes, opportunities for musicality *are* in there. In my experience, it takes time to understand where to look for them. Also, IMO, the dancing experience (in standard) between the dancers is much different than what observers might suppose. That takes time to appreciate, too.

Also, it REALLY HELPS to chew on bite-sized chunks. Even doing a 'simple' waltz box is *hard*, when you start adding all the technical elements and then floorcraft and then even musicality on top of that. There's just no way to try to learn how to do all of that at once (I think).
 
Your meeting doctors and healthcare professionals who are also ballroom dancers is very telling. We love a challenge and we find it in both of these things. I never realized that before I read your post. I think that the other thing these people have is an instinct to nurture. When I go to salsa clubs I may dance for 3 hours and never dance with the same person twice. When it comes to ballroom, I kind of want to stick with one person and nurture our partnership as dancers.

For the most part I just love the journey of learning, even if I don't get it right away. With a few exceptions - I hate American tango. But even with that, I want to keep pushing and pushing until I reach the point where I love tango.

It is so true of ballroom dancers and doctors. They are both people who push themselves well beyond their mental and physical limits every day. They may bitch and bite your head off but they really love what they do.
 
DL said:
(Partly I like the puzzle -- most of the time.)

For me, this goes in phases. I think of ballroom problems as "hard but brittle". I spend time banging my head against some issue. I give it a lot of practice. It gets frustrating. Eventually, in the midst of working on it, at some unpredictable moment, something goes 'click', and I get it. My dancing feels so much better; there's this great feeling of having solved something. Great! What fun! Then, as it turns out, what's really happened, see, is I had this other problem I never realized before, because the first one was in the way...

Lather, rinse, repeat.

That "millimetre away" feeling is in a sense there, then, at every plateau.

However, with time, work, patience, and experience, that process becomes more and more manageable.

So, every problem is only hard... until it isn't.

Also, every 'click' comes with greater dancing facility, and there's plenty of enjoyment (for me) in making use of hard-earned skills.

(Does that help?)

And yes, opportunities for musicality *are* in there. In my experience, it takes time to understand where to look for them. Also, IMO, the dancing experience (in standard) between the dancers is much different than what observers might suppose. That takes time to appreciate, too.

Also, it REALLY HELPS to chew on bite-sized chunks. Even doing a 'simple' waltz box is *hard*, when you start adding all the technical elements and then floorcraft and then even musicality on top of that. There's just no way to try to learn how to do all of that at once (I think).
Click to expand...

:cheers: Wonderful post!

Albanaich, welcome back to 'the dark side.':)
 
Yeah well, I resisted the teeny, the 20 something doctor was irresistible. The darkside has all the best weapons. . . . . .
 
Albanaich said:
a) I'm a sucker when it comes to attractive young women asking me to be their partner
Click to expand...

Can't help you there.

b) I have this love hate relationship with ballroom, I always feel like understanding it is about a millimetre further on from where I'm at - but I can never travel that millimetre.
Click to expand...
Can't help you here either

c) Why are they all doctors or from the medical professions? Why do they want to save me from being an 'undisciplined' dancer.
Click to expand...
Haven't the foggiest.

d) When do you actually get to enjoy ballroom instead of it being an infuriating puzzle you have to beat.
Click to expand...
When you start to understand and enjoy the music, of course.

By the way, this applies to your other thread - http://www.dance-forums.com/showthread.php?t=33949
 
In regards to feeling slightly incomfortable with your potential partner being "the same age as your daughter," I wouldn't worry about it. Speaking from experience, an older and respectful partner is highly desirable, and in any partnership it is essential for each party to encourage/"nurture" the growth of the other.
 
Last year I had a partner that was 18, and much as it was fun, it wasn't really fair on either of us, so I decided to give up on it. Those looks!

This one isn't a girl, if you know what I mean.

The age thing doesn't bother me so much as it bothers other people. It's heartbreaking that there are so many young, attractive, female ballroom dancers about so desperate for a partner that they'll go dancing with someone the same age as their father.

I try to get them into AT and Swing, where there is a chance they might find someone their own age, but they insist on sticking with ballroom where its about 5 girls for every boy.
 
Now, it may be because I'm a social dancer but whether it's swing or ballroom I'm pretty sure it's all great. I have preferences, but not "I'm a WCS dancer or I'm a lindy hopper." Maybe it's just my goal of being a Renaissance Man coming out in my dancing. Or a vast list of other opinions that I could write page after page regarding. In the end though, I love knowing and dancing as many dances as I can.

On a side note, I'm kinda jealous of the OP. I get to dance once a month where I am now, or one weekend a month if I'm lucky. How nice it would be to have attractive blonde doctors asking me to be their partners because my skills are "wasted" on other dances.
 
Come to the UK Orsino. . . . .we are overrun with young female ballroom dancers in search of a partner. . . . . .

In Swing and AT we often have too many guys (young guys as well) whereas in Ballroom the only young male dancers are foriegn students.

My first foray into Ballroom was pretty much the same. A young, attractive doctor whose partner was 74 and half a head shorter was looking for someone 'younger' and the right height.

That's how desperate things are. . . . . . .

That didn't work out because I didn't have the basic dancing skills - but I've moved on since then and am hopeful this will work out.

I still can figure out why a girl can't put her high heels and her short skirt and lure one of the young buck's from AT or Swing into ballroom. Maybe I'm too cynical about this.

Also, being where I am doing the job I do I pretty much have to take my dancing and my partners were I find them so I don't have hang-ups about age or what kind of dancing I do.

Obviously young ladies who want to do swing are to be prefered, but I've done ballroom with a (very good) lady in her late 70's.

I can't see why other folks don't take that attitude. . . .
 
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