Newbie with big dreams feeling overwhelmed

J

Jcapps

New Member
I have very recently started taking lessons and I am totally enamored. While I know I wouldn’t be ready to compete for quite some time - and couldn’t afford anything but local competitions anyway- I am trying to think of ways to be able to afford to pursue learning and dabbling in a few competitions.

Luckily, my husband and I have made some solid financial decisions and our house will be paid off in 2 years (I’ll be 31 when it’s paid off) but right now we don’t have a very big “blow” budget- like it’s be pushing it for me to take a private lesson every week. I’m probably only going to be able to have one every other week and do a group lesson or two every week to keep my practice up. I also have a 2 year old so I can’t do tons of group lessons each week.

I’d love to try to find a scholarship or sponsorship to help cover the lessons. I’m currently working full time and am finishing up my last graduate school class, so I don’t know what would even be available or realistic. Any guidance is greatly appreciated!
 
Welcome to DF! I don't have any ideas for getting more money to put toward it, but I do have some suggestions for making the money you have go further.

That frequency of lessons will be fine to get you started. To take best advantage of them, take notes immediately afterward and practice by yourself between lessons. Even just doing basics while brushing your teeth or on the way from one part of the house to another will help build your muscle memory. Doing the patterns you've learned in class in your living room will keep you from having to relearn them the next time. Go to your studio's practice parties when you can; they're very useful for developing lead-follow skills and diagnosing which of the things you've learned in class you can actually dance "in the wild."

Check out the closest USA Dance chapter, if it's not too far from you; there are chapters in Chattanooga and Knoxville. Or see if there's an independent community ballroom club nearby. Those types of organizations will typically have low-cost lessons and social dances. They'll also help you become part of the local ballroom community so you're in the loop about local opportunities beyond your studio.

As far as competing, it will be way cheaper to compete as an amateur couple than pro-am. Is your husband dancing, too? That would be simplest (though it would require childcare, and dancing with a spouse brings its own complications). But plenty of people compete am-am who aren't life partners. Being hooked into the local ballroom community through group classes, practice parties, and social dances will help you find a potential amateur partner if you decide to go that route. (That would also mean that you and your partner would split the costs of private lessons you take together.) The cheapest amateur competitions are the collegiate competitions, which are typically open to anyone. The next step up price-wise are the USA Dance competitions. If you end up wanting/needing to compete pro-am instead, set your budget first and stick to it. (We've got lots of relevant threads on the forum about that.)

If you're not able to give the time and money to dancing that you'd like, don't worry about it. You've got lots of time! (Personally, I'm planning to continue improving and competing at least into my 60s.) Dance opportunities will still be there when your child is older and your career is more established. So just do what you can and adjust as your circumstances allow. And have fun!
 
Thanks! I’m in Knoxville, so that’s helpful! I’ve also reached out to my colleges ballroom club since lessons there may be less expensive!

My husband wants to try dancing, but he really lacks confidence and hasn’t been able to make it to a single lesson yet. I’m hoping I can get him to join me in competition, but im not counting on it at this point. Thanks for the info!!
 
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just take care to treat it like a potential addiction....slow and steady wins the race and keeps you sane and happily married and not in debt...I say this as a rather intense person who took the non-sane route :)...good instruction and practice will get you there...go to comps and see who's good...quality matters as much as quantity in terms of lessons...and it takes a while to recognize the difference between an outstanding teacher and an average one
 
Jcapps said:
My husband wants to try dancing, but he really lacks confidence and hasn’t been able to make it to a single lesson yet. I’m hoping I can get him to join me in competition, but im not counting on it at this point. Thanks for the info!!
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I hope he manages to try it out eventually! Depending on what he's most nervous about, I could see various options as the easiest way to get his feet wet. Maybe going to one of the USA Dance social dances and just watching? (I'm from the larger region and actually know some of those dancers; they're very nice and friendly and welcoming.) Or a private lesson, just him and the teacher? Or the very first lesson of the college ballroom club in the fall, where everyone's a brand new newbie? (I wouldn't count on that for the best technical instruction, but it would be an easy place to get lost in the crowd, if that would help.)

You seem to already know not to push, but just to reinforce it: if /when the two of you start dancing together, whether in classes, privates, social dances, or practice, do not try to help him with his part, even if you end up being right about what he needs to fix. Bite your tongue and leave it to the teacher. And keep in mind that the learning curve for beginner leaders is much steeper than for beginner followers. (I dance and compete with my husband, who was significantly less experienced when we met; it took us a good while to figure out how to work on dance together without him feeling judged. Like fasc, I'm mostly warning you not to do as I did!)
 
fascination said:
just take care to treat it like a potential addiction....slow and steady wins the race and keeps you sane and happily married and not in debt...I say this as a rather intense person who took the non-sane route :)...good instruction and practice will get you there...go to comps and see who's good...quality matters as much as quantity in terms of lessons...and it takes a while to recognize the difference between an outstanding teacher and an average one
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Thanks! I tend to be an intense person as well! So I think I needed to hear that. And hear it again. Lol
 
I'll echo fasc's comments - don't go crazy when you first start. I remember wearing cheap knockoff shoes, and renting dresses, and practicewear from ebay. One to two lessons a week and very minimal competition. I see too many people fall in love with it quickly, end up spending lots of money on expensive dresses and tons of competitions, and when the honeymoon period wears off, they're left with all that stuff collecting dust. Also, practice on your own when you can :)
 
If you can convince your husband to come to the private lessons with you, the two of you could practice at home for free. :) And he wouldn't have to put himself out there with strangers (which is super intimidating for a novice lead) until he's gained some confidence with you.
 
So I have been dancing for four years now and I nearly burnt out by the second year. I went in as a beginner very hard and when I went to university where there was a club. I was having private lessons most weeks, group classes every week and competing a lot which mounted to alot of stress and money.
My advice is take it slow and steady and find a space to practice even if it is in your kitchen.
Also I went crazy on private lessons actually found I improved at faster rate with less frequent lessons about once every 2-3 weeks instead of once a week because i had time to process and practice the information given and it has shown in my dancing and my results at competitions
 
Dausuul said:
If you can convince your husband to come to the private lessons with you, the two of you could practice at home for free. :) And he wouldn't have to put himself out there with strangers (which is super intimidating for a novice lead) until he's gained some confidence with you.
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I agree that this could be good. But it depends on the specifics of his feelings; it's also possible that he might feel less pressure dancing with random strangers in a group class than with his wife. No matter how careful she is not to push, he knows that she's excited about dancing and would like to compete someday, and I'm sure he wants her to be happy: that raises the stakes. It's good that there are various possible routes of entry, so he can choose the one that feels best to him.
 
Hi there Jcapps. Welcome to the wide, beautiful world of dance!

What I find about improving my dancing is that there are three different forms of practice, and for best results you want each of these in a specific ratio and sequence.

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First, of course, is Lessons. This is where you learn new stuff from a professional, and can get expert feedback on your current status. Lessons, of course, are the most expensive form of practice, but the one most important for making clear progress.

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Next is Slow Practice. In this, you focus closely on improving your understanding of what you learned in your lessons. Studying footwork, step sizes, body positions, interaction with your partner, etc. Slow Practice is slow because you will rarely use music for it, and will rarely do long sequences of different things.

For example,the other day my partner and I spent 20 minutes studying Bounce Fallaway in International Foxtrot, and the next 25 on Spin Turn + Contra Check in International Waltz. Despite the unimpressive-looking amount of material there, I can honestly say it was super productive!

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Finally we have Drill. Here, you just dance to music for a long time. The main purpose is to convert mental processing to muscle memory, so you can stop thinking about steps and patterns and simply enjoy and express the music instead. This can be done anywhere you have space, but social dancing events are a great way to add more fun to it.

If you are interested in either competition or dancing for fitness, Drill is also invaluable for building up strength and stamina.

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The "best" ratio and sequence of these will vary from person to person, but here's what works best for me.

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Slow Practice time should have at least a 1:1 to 2:1 ratio with Lesson time. Without slow practice, the lessons just don't stick--or if they do, I tend to acquire lots of bad habits that I then need to un-learn through later lessons. Super inefficient and expensive!

Ideally, I try to arrange slow practice sessions immediately following a lesson, or at least in the next day or two. The fresher, the better!

In addition, I often do ~10 minutes of slow practice on my own whenever I have nothing better to do. Nothing special here; I just recap a step or pattern or movement wherever I happen to be, be it an empty hallway, my kitchen, an open field where the dog decided to do her business, or whatever. I do this because short, frequent repetitions are far better for knowledge and skills retention than infrequent marathon sessions.

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Drill is the most fun form of practice. I place no upper limits on how much of this I do (life schedule permitting, of course), but at a minimum I try to do drill once per week. As a dance competitor, it's important for me to maintain dance strength and stamina, and dancing 90-straight-minutes once-a-week is the bare minimum necessary to keep my level of conditioning.

In order to add some structure (and warmup) to my drilling, I usually try to schedule a Slow Practice session immediately before it. Music, laughter, and general funtimes aside, I find my dancing itself is much higher quality when I do this.

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As a concrete example, here's what a minimal practice week might look like for me:

MONDAY
45 minute Lesson
45 minute Slow Practice

FRIDAY
45 minute Slow Practice
90 minute Drill (social dance)

If I do any additional lessons, I try to follow up with Slow Pratice, just as you see on Monday. Additional Drill sessions may or may not coincide with anything else--my Fridays work the way they do because the event I favor has a free group lesson beforehand, and they don't mind if my partner and I ignore that and just slow practice in a far-off corner. Also, not shown are the 10-minute sessions I do ad-hoc on my own. Some weeks, I just don't get a free moment!
 
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