Teachers: do you dance at Milongas?

[LittleLight]

Ah, yes. I have a friend who dabbles in AT very rarely, but is a childhood friend of a really good dancer/teacher. He's always trying to introduce me to this guy, get me to send this guy his regards etc. My friend is sweet and he means very well - he's trying to get me a dance with this guy. I'd looooove to dance with him, of course, but not by cornering him that way, so I'm forever doing thinks like saying "your childhood friend x says hi" and then running off quickly.

Where will my momument be?

 

[LoveTango]

isnt there a monument somewhere to the unknown follower?

I am sorry, I didn't get the meaning of this remark.

 

[LoveTango]

Ah yes, the good old "recruitment by intimidation" approach.

Have a read of "Tango Tyrant"...

I also started reading tango commuter's blog. It is good to get a leader's perspective. Now I understand why in one of the most popular milongas here, so many leaders sit out while there are plenty of followers to invite.

I think next time, I will be a little more responsible in starting a dance, without being pushy, of course.
- Off topic, sorry.

 

[LoveTango]

I know how it's been pushed to invite somebody to dance with.

That is not unknown follower, you always have some parameters how you invite a stranger.

Right. I hope that the teachers don't feel this way in milonga. They should be able to freely decide whom to dance with. Although all leaders and followers have similar problems, they have friends and obligations, too.

 

[LoveTango]

Ah, yes. I have a friend who dabbles in AT very rarely, but is a childhood friend of a really good dancer/teacher. He's always trying to introduce me to this guy, get me to send this guy his regards etc. My friend is sweet and he means very well - he's trying to get me a dance with this guy. I'd looooove to dance with him, of course, but not by cornering him that way, so I'm forever doing thinks like saying "your childhood friend x says hi" and then running off quickly.

Where will my momument be?

That's smart of you. I think your friend's friend is less pressured since his friend is not around.

 

[LoveTango]

"Ok so we're supposed to dance together, I will dislike it as much as you will, let's make it quick."

That's exactly what I get from him.
I always hated pity dance.

 

[pascal]

Reminds me of Tete Rusconi, asked by the milonga host to perform for the audience. "Which music do you want to dance on ?", the host added.
Tete stood up, considered the potential partners around, picked up a local female teacher, and replied "A vals. It's shorter, I will suffer less".

Even teachers get pity dances, sometimes.

 

[Dave Bailey]

I also started reading tango commuter's blog. It is good to get a leader's perspective

Yes, John's stuff is always worth reading, I'll tell him you like it when I see him next.

MsHedgehog's blog is also great.

 

[LoveTango]

Yes, John's stuff is always worth reading, I'll tell him you like it when I see him next.

MsHedgehog's blog is also great.

Thanks! Then MsHedgehog's blog will be my next. It will take me a while to finish reading John's.

 

[twnkltoz]

Reminds me of Tete Rusconi, asked by the milonga host to perform for the audience. "Which music do you want to dance on ?", the host added.
Tete stood up, considered the potential partners around, picked up a local female teacher, and replied "A vals. It's shorter, I will suffer less".

Even teachers get pity dances, sometimes.

Ouch!

I've gotten a few pity dances, but in all cases the leaders were very gracious and didn't act like they were being put upon. I was very grateful! Most of them were from teachers/the DJ/the organizer.

 

[LoveTango]

Ouch!

I've gotten a few pity dances, but in all cases the leaders were very gracious and didn't act like they were being put upon. I was very grateful! Most of them were from teachers/the DJ/the organizer.

Most of them are very gracious, I agree.

 

[bordertangoman]

That's exactly what I get from him.
I always hated pity dance.

that's why you need an English gentleman, chivalrous to the end, and treats all women as ladies worthy of dancing with...

BOT i was talking to a female teacher who was very clear that when she taught the students received her undivided attention and when she danced she would only dance with leaders she wanted to dance with. She gave reasons; she didnt want to be pulled about by inexperienced dancers, and she regarded dancing tango as an intimate dance and would only dance with men she felt comfortable with.

While it is a viewpoint different to my own, I can understand this even if it might seem elitist.

 

[UKDancer]

that's why you need an English gentleman, chivalrous to the end, and treats all women as ladies worthy of dancing with...

BOT i was talking to a female teacher who was very clear that when she taught the students received her undivided attention and when she danced she would only dance with leaders she wanted to dance with. She gave reasons; she didnt want to be pulled about by inexperienced dancers, and she regarded dancing tango as an intimate dance and would only dance with men she felt comfortable with.

While it is a viewpoint different to my own, I can understand this even if it might seem elitist.

I don't think that it is appropriate for a teacher to have taken responsibility for the instruction of any student, and then not be prepared to dance with that person because of the standard of the student's dancing. If there is something unacceptable about the student's behaviour, separate from their dance ability, that is different, but that might call into question why the teacher is accepting their money, and continuing their instruction.

As a teacher, I can hardly expect anyone else to dance with my own students if I'm not prepared to, and if I don't always seek the intimacy of the closed embrace, then I've even less excuse. Of course, I wouldn't consider that I had any obligation to dance with a non-student, except by mutual agreement, and in the usual way.

 

[ant]

I don't think that it is appropriate for a teacher to have taken responsibility for the instruction of any student, and then not be prepared to dance with that person because of the standard of the student's dancing.

I have noticed that female teachers are far more likely to have this view than male teachers. I think it comes from self preservation. Some leaders can be very rough and at the end of the day they have got to take care of themselves.

 

[UKDancer]

I have noticed that female teachers are far more likely to have this view than male teachers. I think it comes from self preservation. Some leaders can be very rough and at the end of the day they have got to take care of themselves.

Of course. As long as the teacher is doing something about the problem, and doesn't have the intention never to dance with that person.

BTW, I do think that it is in a teacher's interest to 'work the room' when they are at any event within the geographical area of their own teaching activities, but not to 'have to' dance with students all night, to the exclusion of their own friends or preferred partners - just a healthy mix.

That can apply to the wider dance community too: it is good for experienced dancers to dance with the less experienced (how else are they going to learn to get better? - surely, not by dancing exclusively with each other). Any dancer that always chooses partners for the sake of their own dance enjoyment, is a selfish dancer, and quite probably not nearly as skilled as they would like to think. Anyone can dance with an experienced dancer - even a near beginner.