The Revenge Thread

njdancegirl said:
Me too actually. Am also missing gene to hold a grudge prolly for the same reasons.
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There was a time I would have written the same. It may be true for you - and, there again, you have simply not been there yet... Though i am very glad you have not and hope dearly you never do :)
 
Definitely agree with Larinda, some people are presidposed to letting things go, and some will dwell on/stew about things for months/years. Of course, like anything else, you can work against your underlying tendencies, but it's never easy.
 
Sorry I don't buy this. Lets take it to an extreme (and this is pure fantasy - at least for everyone here I hope). Imagine you were forced to watch someone torture and kill your child. Would you be able to put that to one side and carry on without any wishe for retribution or revenge?
 
elisedance said:
Sorry I don't buy this. Lets take it to an extreme (and this is pure fantasy - at least for everyone here I hope). Imagine you were forced to watch someone torture and kill your child. Would you be able to put that to one side and carry on without any wishe for retribution or revenge?
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i'd kill the bastard if necessary to end the seige...but after that, why waste a minute on such a pathetic loser, other than to protect self & loved ones, or to prosecute if viable.

i mean... if we're talking such an extreme example...
 
ED, obviously some situations will push most anyone to reventge. But some of us, including me at times, though I hate to admit it, will go to revenge even for situations that don't really deserve it.

That being said, messed with my loved ones at your own risk, and that tend to be true for most people. A person who might just laugh off the most grevious assault, emotionally or physically, to themselves, may hunt you to end of the wolrd for a mild assault on thier loved ones. Just about everyone has different reactoins to assaults (physical, mental, emotional) on themselves vs assaults on their loved ones.
 
Larinda McRaven said:
A student of mine's wife was brutally murder walking her puppy one morning. The daughter was so vengeful throughout the trial. Then at the last moment she addressed the judge to not deal the death penalty. She realized that his suffering would not change her life one bit. She watched him be sentenced to prison and then walked away to live a joyous life. I love this woman for her courage to let it go.
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that is beautiful. what a healing for her... wonderful to hear.
 
Lets suppose you can't have that instant satisfaction (revenge actually) I actually think there would be something missing from you as a person if you did not wish for and possibly seek revenge.
 
elisedance said:
Lets suppose you can't have that instant satisfaction (revenge actually) I actually think there would be something missing from you as a person if you did not wish for and possibly seek revenge.
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i have also, like larinda, many justifiable instances in my life where revenge would have been understandble...genuine travesties. i am a radically happier and more empowered person for never having remotely chosen to pursue that path. and there is definitely nothing missing in me...
 
Honestly envy thosee of you who can have this attitude. Not something I've been able to grasp, no matter how hard I've tried.
 
Larinda McRaven said:
A student of mine's wife was brutally murder walking her puppy one morning. The daughter was so vengeful throughout the trial. Then at the last moment she addressed the judge to not deal the death penalty. She realized that his suffering would not change her life one bit. She watched him be sentenced to prison and then walked away to live a joyous life. I love this woman for her courage to let it go.
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That is truly amazing and you are right, an inspiration. I agree. But, truthfully, could you do that? I could not and I doubt that many could.
 
njdancegirl said:
Me too actually. Am also missing gene to hold a grudge prolly for the same reasons.
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I don't hold a grudge either...but I will make myself miserable ruminating over what a person was thinking or why they did something...that is, UNTIL, I decide to be well and enjoy my life again
 
etp777 said:
Definitely agree with Larinda, some people are presidposed to letting things go, and some will dwell on/stew about things for months/years. Of course, like anything else, you can work against your underlying tendencies, but it's never easy.
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stewing and plotting revenge are different though...part of being ready to let something go involves turning it over and over in one's mind...some people require more revolutions than others but it is part of the letting go process
 
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