yesterday's activities

Yeah, but see I won't cave. (Because I'm a [w]itch.) I will not show up a half-hour early...if we've agreed on 11, I'll be there by 11, and they can stuff their grumbling because I'm not there at 10:30. Not.my.problem. If they agree to browsing, I will take them at their word and browse; if they didn't want to, they should have spoken up. Not.my.problem.

The down-side to this approach is that it leaves me rankled for a while...but I'm kind of willing to put up with that in order to stand on ([w]tichy, petty) principle. I'm kind of getting to the point of being done with being (nicely, politely) bulldozed by my family. I love them, but I'm not going to be the only one bending any more.

Heh...DH and i have decided to upset the apple cart this year by *gasp* going out of town for Easter. My new mantra: not my problem.
 
thing is P...and this is your perogative.. but if you knowingly choose to put yourself in a situation that you know will annoy them, and aren't able to let it roll off your back, then YOU are responsible for that misery ya know?....I mean, why browse anything with them when you can all be happier not browsing with them?...why not know that they will be someplace early so set an artificially late time for them so that you can arrive when you please and not frame that as capitulating to them, but rather, managing them because they have to managed....and call that sucess and wisdom on your part?...definately do go out of the box for easter alone and break the chain, but expect the consequence and refuse to feel guilty...anyhow....good luck on it...I have some of that stuff coming to a head over here between my dad and my daughter right now and it is easier said than done in terms of dealing with it and keeping inner peace
 
Yeah. I waffle between the two viewpoints, honestly. Yesterday was eye-opening: didn't realize the browsing thing would become an issue. I never thought about the aritificially late time thing... Hm. I wonder why that didn't occur to me, since I do it with DH and have recommended it to them. Heh. I will ponder. Hmm. :-) Thanks for the food for thought on this one!
 
no problem...I will also note...that...as a person with increasing aches and pains, I don't care to browse much because it hurts my back and feet and frankly, I am not a shopper....I would expect my kids to maybe know those things about me or pick up on it and maybe keep that sort thing to a minimum...aging does suck in that regard....example, we wanted my dad to experience his young grandson at disney...and all dad could think about was all the walking etc....so our attempt to carve out a way that it would work for him was to meet him at epcot for lunch where he could sit and not be inundated by bunches of youth and noise and lack of places to sit down....shrug....sometimes older folks prefer not to share that something is unpleasant for them because of age...it is a matter of pride...they would prefer to be miserable, not realizing that it is so noticable....I remember whn my father in law stopped offering to come over and do household repair projects and the like...at first I was sort of resentful...and then I realized..hey, he's getting old...just a few more things to put in the bozo -puter...something about being a parent that you might not appreciate since you haven't had that experience, is that parents really don't want their kids to know about their limitations, but sometimes they get resentful when their adult kids can't begin to realize that they have them...but parents in general usually won't tell their kids that sort of thing......and most older folks get everywhere early because they have the time to do so :)...my retiree class at the gym? everyone is there early....my young mom class at the gym? everyone is late....anyhow....am sure you will navigate it all as well as possible
 
Peaches: I really enjoyed your analogy regarding herding cats. I don't know what to say other than if you know what a situation is going to be like, don't put yourself in it.

Friday

Up early
Work
Group project meeting at work
Leave work at lunch
Go to Arnold Classic at the Convention Center; very crowded; get tons of free stuff, including 2 t-shirts, several full size and sample size protein bars, a couple of protein shake packets, lots of energy drink mixes, two single serving cereal boxes, three granola bars, a local newspaper, 4 metropolitan magazines, 2 fitness magazines, and other random stuff
Text friend with information about senior dance sport event
Go to bead store and buy materials to make St. Patrick's day earrings
Drive to Staples and buy two sets of drawer organizers for my jewelry armoire
Double lesson with pro; we work on new open foxtrot routine; I like the routine, by far it's my favorite; but at this point all I'm doing is trying to learn the choreography and the counts; there isn't much technique and even less styling; I am happy with progress and pro seems happy
Decide to drive to Kroger's and pick up a few things for party, also buy People magazine special edition about The Hunger Games
Party, my feet are killing me by this time, I dance a lot, for me
Stay to help clean up after the party
Drive home
Bed

Saturday

Sleep in
Vacuum and general cleaning
Watch season finale of White Collar and episode of The Closer
Eat lunch
Three hour nap
Lounge around
Read A Stolen Life by Jaycee Dugard
Bed early

Sunday

Up by eight
Read newspaper
Gym
Dinner
Random projects, organizing material for taxes, going through mail, putting laundry away, organizing jewelry armoire, and cleaning bathroom tub
Make St. Patrick’s Day earrings; flip between basketball game, Miami Heat vs. L.A. Lakers, and golf
TV interrupted by call from former co-worker; by the time the call is over, both the basketball game and golf is over
Snack
Lounge around; finish reading A Stolen Life
Decide to take pictures of earrings to post on Facebook
Iron
Watch House Hunters International
Bed early
 
Peaches said:
Yeah. I waffle between the two viewpoints, honestly. Yesterday was eye-opening: didn't realize the browsing thing would become an issue. I never thought about the aritificially late time thing... Hm. I wonder why that didn't occur to me, since I do it with DH and have recommended it to them. Heh. I will ponder. Hmm. :-) Thanks for the food for thought on this one!
Click to expand...


When I was dating and later, married to, the ex, I went absolutely crazy over time. I am on time. Born and raised by punctual people. He is ALWAYS late. And I don't mean not early. I mean five minutes to five hours late. Never could tell what I was going to get, except that I knew it wasn't going to be on time. Ever.

My solution? Stop expecting him to be on time. And stop stressing about it. And stop taking ownership for his behavior. If he was late, he was late. Nothing for me to feel responsible for or be embarassed about. (For example, when we were meeting mutual friends.)

On the rare occasion that it was essential that he be on time, I made a huge deal out of it. But even then, I let go of ownership of his behavior.

When it wasn't essential that he be on time, I arranged my own transportation and got there at a time that worked for me.
 
and this sort of thing can also be extremely cultural...obvously in peaches case it should be the same btwn she and her parents in that regard, but...having gone to funerals for just about every culture under the sun and/or had appts with the same...some cultures have a very non-linear approach to time...my son, having spent a year in Africa, will tell you that concepts of time mean virtually NOTHING over there as I am sure you are aware...I am Polish...if we are late, we are dead...I call my pro to tell him I am going to be late when I am running on time...and he, likewise, is not late...now, there are exceptions to every rule...but there are trends about how time is viewed...there are also differences in how people use that ethic with themselves as opposed to others...personally, I don't care how late anyone else is as long as it doesn't reflect on me or impact me...come to my house two hours late ...that is fine...make me late, that is NOT...but, back to peaches point...if I know someone else is incompatible with me on these issues, I will artificially manipulate the time to my benefit when possible...or come up with some other strategy...for a long while dh couldn't get to church on time...so we took separate cars...
 
Friday:
drive to insuranec adjust an hour away - 9:15am apt.
insurance adjuster says cannot release check. Call insurance company main office and refuse to leave the office until they clear thinsg up. 25 minutes later with people impatiently waiting behind me leave with check in hand. (I say don't you dare tell em on Wednesday that the insurance adjuter will give me the check on Friday and then make problems for me.)
11:00am at body shop in Ithaca to hand over apperwork and schedule dropping off car on Monday
Call insuarance company and they only want to authorize a rental for 6 days. A few choice words and suddenly 8 days isn't a problem.
Grocery shopping and then back home
1;30pm start cooking - spicy tomato and oion semolina (upma), broccoli quiche, stemed veggies, quinoa with french lentils, soup.
6:30 to 8:00pm a freidn coem sover to practice. She will eb my partner in a salsa demo on the 10th.
8:40pm to 10:00pm dinner with another friend. Broccoli quiche - my first tiem ever makinga quiche - if an unqualified success!
Clean up and in bed by midnight.



Yesterday:
up at 8:00am
Vineyard service 9:15-10:30
social break
St Catherine of Siena service 11:30-12;40
meeting christ in prayer lenten group 12:40 to 2:15pm
vineyard membership class : 2;25pm to 3:40pm
rush to work
telephone interview job 4:00pm to 8:20pm
back home and continue catching up on lots of stuff
to bed at 2:00am
 
Monday:

Usual AM stuff.
8:20--Drop off Child.

9:10--Great Works II. Brothers Karamazov. Discussion was good, but energy level could have been better.

10:20--Postcolonial Literature. Maitreyi Devi, It Does Not Die.

Lunch, prep.

12:40--British Novels II. Hardy's Jude the Obscure. Quiz, then discussion. Some people really bombed the quiz.

Office hours. Read a rough draft.

Home. Quick snack, quick change of outfit.

4:30-6--Double Nik lesson. Really good ones!

Drove home. Dinner.

8:30--7 miles on treadmill, 5 running, 2 walking. Best I've felt running in quite a while.
Shower.

Bed.
 
Monday

Up early
Work, have a lot of projects getting rid of old records
Leave work early
Dinner
Drive to Michael's to pick up beads; friend has requested I make her a few pair of earrings; she requests something sparkly, neutral colors that will go with anything, and nothing that dangles down too far; it's a challenge
Drive to Stapes and pick up an additional set of drawer organizers for jewelry armoire
Pay Sears bill at K-Mart
Buy groceries at Kroger; don't buy much and grocery bill is under $30
Home
Lounge around
Bed

Tuesday

Up early
More projects at work getting rid of old records; I have many paper cuts to show for it
Leave work early
Dinner
Watch My First Place and Law & Order
Make breakfast and lunch for next day
Read newspaper
Drive to studio for lesson; more of the open foxtrot routine; pro and I seem to have a grasp of the order of things; pro seems pleased; also revisted the beginning of the open waltz routine; pro and I decide to watch the videos for the open waltz and I wonder where all the new stuff came from
Drive home
Iron clothes for next day at work
Bed
 
dont remember when I last posted...but monday was a da of catch-up...taught step then came home and washed gowns, changed cat litter, ...various other stuff that I can't remember now....yesterday (tues) I had engaged couples to see and then continued to catch-up by calling a mason for the dtr crashing into house episode, and to call nipsco about a gas leak outside of the house....browsed pics of recent comps, couldn't find one that I could tolerate....enjoyed a nice quiet evening with dh
 
Yesterday, all quiet on the work front. YES! ahhhhhhh.
DF-surfed.
Realized,,,,gotta inspect and re-pack competition "go bag" hmmmm.
Find, $3 off Got To Be Glued hair product - $2 off Maybelline Make Up products, $1 off Lipstick product, $3 off Oil of Olay product with a $10 rebate offer, $2 off coupon for Clairol Hair Color and finally when the stomach hurts watching the video from a comp - a $2 off Zantac package.
Husband snickers - proceeds to call DS. I hear him clearly say
"You keep saying $$$ are going out of your wallet, you should shop with your mom - she's a champ at saving money in the store - you could learn a thing or two".
I secretly smile to myself.
Nighty night.
 
Sunday: Taxes and telephone and taxes and... but at least they're done, now

Monday: Lesson, in which the tension of doing the effing taxes screwed things up; also, a lesson learned: no more coffee for you, missy
Get passport photo taken; passport expired last year, oops
Packing and shipping and packing and shipping and dealing with Spouse
Group class; Bolero
Dinner after in my favorite resto; salmon, salad, yum
 
Yesterday:

Gyro; almost didn't go b/c I have a crick in my neck from sleeping funny, but geez, how dumb would it have been *not* to work out? Gyro was fab
Lesson, which went much better than Monday; DB#2 watched, at the end, b/c she competes after me, and is almost always getting her hair and makeup done when I'm dancing, so she wanted to watch; I watch the start of her lesson, she's lovely
Deal with Spouse
Packing and shipping
Home; make din; crash and burn
 
Late to work.
Boss man....let's me know not to leave early like I've been doing. (brain to self - really? when you know my retirement paperwork is in the works and only stalled because of the Union...hmmmmmmmm....personally don't care and he knows it).
Read yahoo news article about mom losing legs protecting kids in tornado, talked to DH about sending donation for her recovery.
Looked up more NCL free style cruises - trying to come up with 60th birthday plan for DH that I would also enjoy.
Pro leaves msg - Welcome Back....snicker - nooooo lesson for me I'm not in the mood.
Spend time trying to figure out - competitions/costs - etc vs travel to Itlay and Canada.
DD - calls - excited - had two excellent interviews for promotion, my fingers cross.
DH calls - taxes - RATS! this year we pay.
DH suggests he be the "chef" for the evening, as my back is whacked from sitting at my office desk.
We make plans for nieces wedding in Tucson AZ in April. I love Tucson, now I get a chance to explore it.
DH - to me - are you ever going to unpack from vacation? my response - I think I'm hanging onto the last nano-second of relaxation...and unpacking means I'm really home! yikes.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Dance Ads

Advertise on Dance Forums Reach dancers, teachers, studios, event organizers, and dance-friendly brands. View ad options
Back
Top