Your 2010 AT resolutions?

Mario7 said:
If someone wants to acquire fluent Spanish, the next step is to stop talking about it in English..stop translating. The best thing one can do is look/listen to real Spanish broadcasts (news, telenovelas) and podcasts (can be replayed) totaly in Spanish. Listen to the sound changes only..do NOT try to translate...understanding will come if you have already put in a year of 'study'. Listening for one hour a day (religiously) will do it for you. If your attention wanders, pretend that you are the one doing the talking as you listen...or silently mouth the sylable changes as they occur...only listen to sylable changes..do not think! (because your 'thinking' will be in English)..being able to step out of your English comfort zone and stand alone in the discomfort of the foreign language is THE task..that is why 'classes' don't work...they either speak English during the class or the 'conversation' is not authentic, real communication...the language has to be secondary to the 'message'. The message has got to be real, meaningful, interesting communication. We as humans acquire and handle language naturally...once you take the 'teacher' out of the equation. This paragraph can save you two years of ineffective 'classroom' and home study. Also, Pimsler tapes and Rosetta stone courses do not work...not authentic language..that's who/how we are as humans..we are wired for acquiring language if it is used in real situations. Language is spontaneous and does not need to be 'remembered' if the comprehension is fluent. Work on your comprehension the rest will be there when you need it.
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Hmmmm.

To be honest I don't really understand this. Perhaps I first need to start working on my English comprehension... :D
 
Dave Bailey said:
The way I've worked it out is that you should only make "To-Do" type resolutions, rather than "be a better person" stuff. Things you can actually achieve.
So you can look back in (say) 6 months and say "Have I done / started this yet", and if not, that's a reminder.

It's a theory...
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I think there are both parts to resolutions.
Goals and Tasks.

The goal is NOT the to-do stuff... its the end result you want in a given category. Goals have to be measurable. You have to have a way of determining that the goal has or hasn't been met.

The Tasks are how you get there.

You can't reach a goal without the task list, but what's the point of having tasks with no goal in mind? Then its just drudgery.

For instance, having a goal of "lose weight" is not specific enough and its not really the goal anyway... someone who wants to lose weight wants to because of some reason. Losing weight is actually a task to help with that deeper goal, whether it be "be healthier" or "feel better about my appearance" or whatever. So if the goal is "be healthier", then one can pinpoint what being healthier means and what it would take to achieve a measurable improvement in health.

"Be a better person" is a reasonable goal if you can define what that means. What makes you a person that isn't better? What areas of your life are areas where you think you fail to be a better person? What do you need to do differently day by day to feel you are a better person? What specific actions will make a difference?

"Be a better person" IS a goal, but its not a task. "Really listen when my partner talks about her day" is a task, but in order to do it consistently and make it a habit, there has to be a reason - a larger goal - in mind.

The tasks help you achieve the goal, and defining the results of achieving the goal help you know whether you are successful. So you need to examine all three.

The Goal
What Constitutes Success (ie: resulting life changes)
The Path to get there (the to do list of practical steps and their time frames)
 
Zoopsia59 said:
I think there are both parts to resolutions.
Goals and Tasks.

The goal is NOT the to-do stuff... its the end result you want in a given category. Goals have to be measurable. You have to have a way of determining that the goal has or hasn't been met.

The Tasks are how you get there.

You can't reach a goal without the task list, but what's the point of having tasks with no goal in mind? Then its just drudgery.

For instance, having a goal of "lose weight" is not specific enough and its not really the goal anyway... someone who wants to lose weight wants to because of some reason. Losing weight is actually a task to help with that deeper goal, whether it be "be healthier" or "feel better about my appearance" or whatever. So if the goal is "be healthier", then one can pinpoint what being healthier means and what it would take to achieve a measurable improvement in health.
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So if the goal was to lose 10 pounds, wouldn't that be specific and measurable? Couldn't the tasks to accomplish this goal be to exercise and diet?
 
Zoopsia59 said:
The Goal
What Constitutes Success (ie: resulting life changes)
The Path to get there (the to do list of practical steps and their time frames)
Click to expand...

So in response to my own theory, as regarding AT...

"Improve my dancing" is too vague on its own. And its pretty silly as a goal, because unless I just stop dancing completely, chances are I'm going to improve with or without conscious effort. (Of course, the AMOUNT of improvement might vary quite a bit.;))

So my goal would be "Feel more joy in dancing."

What constitutes success?
I leave milongas feeling good about my experience and wishing I could dance all night a certain percentage of the time and less often I leave feeling frustrated or depressed. At the moment its about half and half... I'd say a realistic thing for me to shoot for over a period of time (to be determined) is 75/25%

Of course to get beyond this point I have to figure out WHY I leave unhappy sometimes vs when I feel good.
Reasons for being unhappy might be:

Dissatisfied with my own dancing
Physical problems causing pain or reduced ability
Spent too much of the night sitting, not getting asked to dance.
Wishing for a higher level of partners.
Hearing a student has switched to another teacher
Arguing/ conflict with my partner while dancing, or partner unwilling to go.

There are specific things I can do to reduce the likelyhood and/or impact of these situations and create the experience that I see as desirable. Figuring out the task list means deciding one or two which bother me most (or conversely, make me the happiest if you work the list from the other side) and addressing them, plus figuring out one or two which are probably the easiest to achieve and addressing a few of those too in order to get things rolling positively. Attacking all these issues equally right at the start will make it harder to address ANY effectively.

So that's how I try to go about my goal setting for the coming year. Its not a quick process as I have to do this for a number of areas of life. But each area I chose to do this with is also the result of trying to imagine an overall picture and what areas of my life will play the biggest part in making that scenario a reality.

I figure I'm worth the time it takes to do this process periodically, and New Years is as good a time as any. :D
 
dchester said:
So if the goal was to lose 10 pounds, wouldn't that be specific and measurable? Couldn't the tasks to accomplish this goal be to exercise and diet?
Click to expand...

I guess what I'm saying is that the goal addresses the WHY.

WHY do you want to lose 10 pounds? What's that going to do for you? How will it improve your life? That improvement is the real goal, not the weight loss. Otherwise, what's the point of bothering to lose weight?

Losing a certain amount of weight might be part of the measurable portion of working towards the WHY goal, and the specific things one does to lose the weight would be on the task list. But losing weight is never the true goal... maybe the reason people have so much trouble sticking to weight loss plans and maintaining their motivation is because they are using a number on the scale as the goal. I think that achieving the larger WHY goal probably is going to require more than just a specific pound reduction and that "success" may need a few more parameters than just that number.

(I'm guessing on this one because I have never had to deal with the struggle of major weight loss... but I've had other struggles of my own where its easy to focus on the wrong thing)

I also think a goal needs to be a positive statement rather than a negative one. "Be healthier" is a positive goal. "Not be fat" is a negative one. In other words define the goal by what you want to be, not what you don't want to be. (not saying anything about YOU and fat... I'm just extrapolating on your question as an example)
 
Dave Bailey said:
I'm fairly sure that it's extremely difficult to measure though. Whereas (say) "Learn Spanish" is much more tangible.
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It could be considered that yes, Spanish, has a degree more tangibility about it. But question: where is the goodness in learning it if, say, the mind behind the tongue that utters it is of no worth?

Dave Bailey said:
How?
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Like anything, it starts from the word. View it as say, the alchoholic who finally admits that they have a problem. Therein lies the path to recovery. And then...as if by magic...the doors start to open for all new possibilities.

It is all well and good wanting that new house, a boyfriend, a baby, learning a new language, improving our tango etc. but what does it mean if we are not striving first and foremost to be a good person? Both within and without. I remember a question my father once asked me when one day (or could've been an entire month) I was behaving like an utter wretch. "Heather," he said, "tell me, don't you want people at your funeral". Ha, ha, ha.
 
Lilly_of_the_valley said:
This advice, however sound for certain cases and, I am sure, well-intended, is based on many assumptions. None of them is right in my situation, for example.
In general, I believe, while giving advice, it is not a good idea to assume. It is easy to inadvertently end up talking down to people that is usually not received very well.
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I thoroughly agree with Mario. Unfortunately, he used one too many paragraphs in the description and thus got people's backs up. In short: total immersion. Live, breathe the language throughout the day so that it becomes a second langague or, do what I did and go and live in the country.
 
Heather2007 said:
... In short: total immersion. Live, breathe the language throughout the day so that it becomes a second langague or, do what I did and go and live in the country.
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Yes, immersion of some sort (Spanish speaking boy-friend?) is THE way to go...live in the country and avoid English at all costs...My multi-paragraph was for those who want to attain fluency at home in the comfort of their own bedroom (without a boy-friend)..IE: listening for an hour a day to BsAs TV on your PC..and when you finally step off of the plane in Argentina, it will be like walking out of your own bedroom...still at home.:!::D
Another Biggie is that people really don't realize the 'how' they learned a language..the few that do get to fluency (because of some immersion) will still bellieve that they learned it in School because the 'teacher' corrected them....it's 'reasonable' to believe that but that's not the way it worked. OK..I'm off of my soapbox..no more.:cool:
 
Heather2007 said:
It could be considered that yes, Spanish, has a degree more tangibility about it. But question: where is the goodness in learning it if, say, the mind behind the tongue that utters it is of no worth?
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Cor, you're so deep you are. DeepHeather2007, I shall call you from now on :p

Heather2007 said:
It is all well and good wanting that new house, a boyfriend, a baby, learning a new language, improving our tango etc. but what does it mean if we are not striving first and foremost to be a good person?
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I have to say, being a good person is not high on my priority list. Sorry, I know that makes me a bad person (by definition). My priority list is more about personal growth for myself and my family.

Heather2007 said:
Both within and without. I remember a question my father once asked me when one day (or could've been an entire month) I was behaving like an utter wretch. "Heather," he said, "tell me, don't you want people at your funeral". Ha, ha, ha.
Click to expand...
For me, Plan A is not to have a funeral. :)
 
Heather2007 said:
I thoroughly agree with Mario. Unfortunately, he used one too many paragraphs in the description and thus got people's backs up. In short: total immersion. Live, breathe the language throughout the day so that it becomes a second langague or, do what I did and go and live in the country.
Click to expand...
Yes, absolutely. If you want to learn something - anything - then the absolute best way to learn it is to throw yourself in the deep end. If you want to learn to dance AT as danced in BsAs, the absolute best way to learn that is to go and live in BsAs and do it there, 24/7.

However, life being what it is, many of us can't commit to that, so we have to find alternatives which best match our other personal and professional commitments.
 
Dave Bailey said:
However, life being what it is, many of us can't commit to that, so we have to find alternatives which best match our other personal and professional commitments.
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You think? :p

2010 resolutions :
- Wear flashier clothes on the dance floor (DJ/suits/waistcoats etc etc)
- Visit Berlin for the tango :D

The rest of the stuff ... you know, the technical stuff ... well that's just a permanent work-in-progress , isnt it? :rolleyes:
 
Well I usually put a clean shirt on at least ... :rolleyes:

Yes happy New Year to everyone - hopefully we'll be dancing together - in spirit at least :cool:

ps I will be attending a certain Moulin Rouge themed NY milonga .....
 
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