Are followers in smaller communities pickier?

[JournalInTime]

You can announce yourself by contacting the host for the event usually through their FB page.

For sure that would work if they have such a thing! But in the case of the friend I mentioned a while back, the event is really a social gathering at an old man's house . . . he doesn't even have a computer. And in the case of my hometown, the FB page was last updated in September 2024. My experience is that a regularly maintained FB page is a feature of bigger communities.

 

[opendoor]

..shouldn't forget that milonga campera..

But it falls under folklore and therefore has a completely different sociological and geographical basis. When the milonga típica was invented in the cities, the connection to the rural milonga was cut. I only became acquainted with milonga campera, with its typical bordoneo and guitar arpeggios, at alternative milongas. In Buenos Aires, it's different, as tango and folklore are always taught together in the (still?) state-run dance academies these days.

 

[opendoor]

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[opendoor]

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[Brummbaer]

But it falls under folklore and therefore has a completely different sociological and geographical basis. When the milonga típica was invented in the cities, the connection to the rural milonga was cut. I only became acquainted with milonga campera, with its typical bordoneo and guitar arpeggios, at alternative milongas. In Buenos Aires, it's different, as tango and folklore are always taught together in the (still?) state-run dance academies these days.

Folklore now, but back in the 19th century it was music for dancing by the few in the vast rural areas before they came to the cities (gauchos to compraditos). I wasn't looking at its connections to AT but that there were people in remote rural areas who got together to dance some styles, which we now refer to as 'folklore' - as 'ballroom' was suggested as the goto for such areas today. Maybe today's rock 'n' roll replaces 'ballroom' - or it could be AT, or some fusion.

Ceilidhs sometimes appear as a 'goto' nowadays! Interesting reasons since fewer probably know any of the dances (like ballroom), but you can make mistakes and it's seen as social, mixer, fun. 'Serious' ballroom, and AT to some extent, have taken that 'fun' aspect.

 

[itwillhappen]

If the behaviour is consistent that the followers are 'unfriendly' I suggest he look at himself

I believe this is always a good idea, if only because it's very difficult, if not impossible, to change even a small group. But there can be many reasons why he's not accepted in the small group. I would take a close look at whether it actually works in the larger group, or whether the issues are simply less noticeable.

For me, it starts with an open question: why doesn't someone find a regular partner for classes and workshops?
(And for many, this is just as provocative a question as the one about personal hygiene.)

 

[itwillhappen]

Whilst I'd agree with the generality that it can't establish, it's sometimes surprising. Ballroom also loses interest. I'm always surprised by the number of people from obscure and remote parts of Scotland, or from the other side of the country, who sometimes turn up at milongas - even in northern England. I think the most notable was the lady who needed a ferry to get across some loch in order to travel to get to a milonga - and a few hours by train to get to a metropolis. I also recollect the couple we met on a course who taught a small class in some obscure village.

However you're correct about 'establishing'. These are exceptions. AT required the metropolis of BsAs as its catalyst, although we shouldn't forget that milonga campera. @JournalInTime has already described this in Canada.

By the way: Congratulations on your 4000th post here on DF, @Brummbaer!

 

[opendoor]

..also host out-of-town regional instructors for weekend workshops..

I welcome your commitment!

 

[TTanguero]

And did I mention that I'm envious of Europeans, who seem to be able to find a good level of tango a short, inexpensive drive or train ride away? (The equivalent here being c. 5 hours and 250€.)

Yeah, although I live in London and almost never dance here, I still have plenty of great milongas to go to around an hour's train ride away.

 

[itwillhappen]

And did I mention that I'm envious of Europeans, who seem to be able to find a good level of tango a short, inexpensive drive or train ride away? (The equivalent here being c. 5 hours and 250€.)

I also have to realize that I live in the Ruhr area, a metropolitan region with over 5 million people within a one-hour radius. If I'm even willing to drive for two hours, that includes also cities like Cologne, Antwerp, and Amsterdam.

 

[tangoing]

For me, it starts with an open question: why doesn't someone find a regular partner for classes and workshops?
(And for many, this is just as provocative a question as the one about personal hygiene.)

I actually think finding a regular tango practice partner as a lead is a lot harder even than finding someone to date outside of tango, especially in nyc.
Tango mirrors real life so followers gravitate towards leads that are better than them. Add that to the complexity of scheduling and finding free time for both people + any issues with finances it can be quite difficult.
I can find some practice partners that are below my level (where i may even be a better follower than them), but can rarely find one that’s similar to my own level, especially if I want someone in a similar age range (30s or below).

 

[opendoor]

..followers gravitate towards leads that are better than.. I can find some practice partners that are below my level ...but can rarely find one that’s similar to my own..

That's exactly the way it is, but everyone's used to it. That's why I always had two practice partners: when the regular practice partner reached your level and jumps off, the next one can take her place, and so on. This way, you stay visible in the scene and are generally considered a sociable person. That's all a practice partner is supposed to do.

 

[brujo]

If the behaviour is consistent that the followers are 'unfriendly' I suggest he look at himself, and perhaps in particular his clothing, grooming and oral health and hygiene. AS a 5'3" follow, my head is sometimes level with your mouth and your armpits.

I wish this was the case. But I’ve been able to get dances and cabezeoing folks ok in the bigger city.

What I’ve been feeling lately is that the expectations at a milonga and what they are in the smaller city are more rigid and formal than in the bigger city. Maybe because my bigger city is super liberal and skews younger ( Portland ) there feels to be more openness and friendliness. Also there are more events for non-dancers and friends like live music events so folks tend to be more encouraging of newbies.

I hear about DJs in the smaller cities not continuing the tango song if someone is dancing to a cortina, for example, so the idea of very rigid formal codigos with an older crowd seems to permeate the smaller scenes. You kinda feels this tenseness at the milongas compared to the more informal practicas after classes.

 

[tangoing]

That's exactly the way it is, but everyone's used to it. That's why I always had two practice partners: when the regular practice partner reached your level and jumps off, the next one can take her place, and so on. This way, you stay visible in the scene and are generally considered a sociable person. That's all a practice partner is supposed to do.

I mean ideally the partner that’s lower in skill doesn’t reach my level since i’m improving too…

 

[brujo]

I mean ideally the partner that’s lower in skill doesn’t reach my level since i’m improving too…

A guy in my community quit because the practice partner he had decided that she wanted to learn to lead. Couldn’t find anyone else.