Yes. A verbal request is certainly a Non-Maskable Interrupt (NMI). Perhaps motivated by a simple desire to get a dance within a limited time.
Cabeceo and Other "Rules"
- Thread starter Gssh
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ArbeeNYC
Forum Master
What philosophical opposition might that be? Conceptually, it's not complicated. And is no more foreign a concept than AT itself.
ArbeeNYC
Forum Master
Yes, that's the underlying issue. Some teachers, schools, locales do a better job at explaining this than others.
Well I often "cabeceo" people in non-AT contexts and it works.
There are a few people who think polite verbal invitations are a better form of etiquette or that strict cabeceo codes tend towards elitism. Of course, one has to be a popular dancer for this explanation to actually be credible.
Because
- the tanda system (A tango specific issue) forces the adoption of some sort of defensive measures to avoid being stuck in an unenjoyable dance for 10 minutes, which is too long
- most people don't feel good about rejecting others or being rejected, either at the invitation or stopping after the first song
- therefore verbal invitation where one person enjoys the dance and the other does not will cause a negative experience for someone
JournalInTime
Forum Master
Mystique, plain and simple. Like any pastime, tango has its terminology and secret codes – the things that set it apart from other pastimes (in this case, other dances). So, tango dancers like to bring up these elements: reactionaries, to glorify tradition; progressives, to question it; elitists, to establish dominance and exclusivity; beginners, to belong; troublemakers, to get a rise out of others; and so on.
I mean, in my other major hobby – mixology – people discuss traditions that other food-and-beverage hobbyists don't care about. Everybody in those hobbies stirs stuff, for instance, but only mixologists get obsessive about wrist angle. Lots of them use ice, too, but only mixologists are nutty about achieving perfectly clear ice carved a certain way. It's like that.
In the case of cabeceo, its existence isn't what's talked about – as others have pointed out, any dance where people hang out in crowded, noisy rooms develops visual invitations. It's the degree of ritualization and glorification above all other forms of invitation that's discussed. Most other dances are very open about what constitutes a visual invitation, and are just as relaxed about verbal ones, but tango elevates the visual invitation.
I think the cabeceo is cool and use it almost exclusively when I invite others. But I'm also fine with being invited verbally by others, and I have never witnessed the pandemonium and social chaos that supposedly descend upon milongas where people don't use it at all. Its perceived value is blown out of proportion to its actual importance.
But again, it's mystique. A rock 'n' roller's thumbs-up would work just fine, but some tango traditionalists would be shocked by its difference from the tango ritual.
JournalInTime
Forum Master
Of course, by rejecting the whole "lady/gentleman" view of "woman/man" as a sexist construct that's well past its Use By date, I'm likely missing some subtlety of lady-like and gentlemanly conduct that the cabeceo protects or privileges. I believe that the two dancers are exactly equal partners, that the leader isn't mostly "responsible" for the tanda, that a follower invitation thus isn't an imposition of responsibility, and that in fact leader/follower doesn't have to mean man/woman. So, to me it's all a bit quaint that we have this ritual of Mr. Dashing Prince inviting Ms. Shy Flower and taking charge of her, and this dislike of Ms. Flower being bold and asking Mr. Prince because it somehow imposes something on Mr. Prince that his invitation doesn't impose on Ms. Flower (hah!).
So, my proposed explanation might rub you the wrong way.
So, my proposed explanation might rub you the wrong way.
JournalInTime
Forum Master
Before the pandemic, there was one specific event where I was one of the very, very few leaders present. There was a literal queue to dance with leaders, and people often made "you need a dance card" jokes. I have to admit that the constant verbal pressure was intrusive. In that case, it's mostly that I wished followers would invite visually, not verbally. The inversion of who invites whom didn't bother me even a little, but I'll concede that conversations that take minutes are less good than nods that take seconds when there's limited dancing time and an actual queue of partners waiting to use it.
Naddrin Kentlar
Active Member
Most people discuss cabeceo as something you do to accommodate the other.
I do however found quite a few advantages personally.
- tango can get intimate and there is a lot of nonverbal subconscious communication
- what I mean by it is that if I don't cabeceo someone then there's a chance that my partner will still be thinking about other things and dancing 10 minutes with a follower that doesn't particularly wants to dance that tanda with me is not pleasant
- if you cabeceo someone it means that the other person is already actively seeking to dance with you at the time on that particular music (the reason why it's not important, just enjoy)
I do however found quite a few advantages personally.
- tango can get intimate and there is a lot of nonverbal subconscious communication
- what I mean by it is that if I don't cabeceo someone then there's a chance that my partner will still be thinking about other things and dancing 10 minutes with a follower that doesn't particularly wants to dance that tanda with me is not pleasant
- if you cabeceo someone it means that the other person is already actively seeking to dance with you at the time on that particular music (the reason why it's not important, just enjoy)
Not really. Cabeceo is a foreign concept in most '1st world' (for want of a better differentiation) countries, although similar non-verbal invites may be used. Staring at someone in some cultures can even be seen as disrespectful, or even agressive. A direct, verbal, approach is preferred. Cabeceo offers additional means of communication over a distance, given line-of-sight, so it can prove advantageous in appropriate conditions, or adapted (the 'walkeceo').
Back in the late 19th, early 20th, century it was possibly a respectable way for a couple in Argentina to get together. Probably many other theories. I've also heard some theory that men stayed in the centre of the dance floor and walked around to choose a partner in line-of-sight during, what was then, the 'cortina'. It's become another myth that's carried, sometimes usefully, into today's milongas.
Add to this the more recent change from invitation as a male prerogative (women always could invite with cabeceo), then I don't find it odd that cabeceo is a subject for discussion amongst this non-Argentine group.
Depends where you are. Some don't like the evolution of their concept of tradition in non-BsAs' milongas (It works; don't fix it). For others, it doesn't work in their circumstances (whole range of reasons - room layout, seating, numbers, lighting, cortinas, or lack of, what's cabeceo?, non-traditional 'milonga', etc.) There AT has become just a dance with certain steps, and maybe certain attributes, but not a culture.
I've been working my way through "Tango!...,""Search for the Embrace...," and "Un Tango Mas." There are adequate recorded testimonies that men did indeed stand in the middle of the floor at some venues during the "Golden Age," and that cabeceo was used. Oh, and girls from the provinces attended dances unaccompanied while the city girls had their mothers in attendance to watch over them. There are also accounts that the Centre was more of a/an (semi) anonymous gathering while the neighborhoods consisted of locals where, again, mothers kept a watchful eye over their daughters. Here you can add Cacho Dante to the list of individuals who talked about this on camera. I hope that at a certain point I'll have a shareable account of what I've been finding in those sources.
ArbeeNYC
Forum Master
It is far more subtle than any verbal invitation and is, rightly, considered a part of the dance itself. That is why it is important and often discussed (often for a failure to appreciate these qualities).