How many dances

Vin

Vin

New Member
I am sure this has been touched on somewhere else but I couldn't find it. I guess what I am asking is what is the norm for how many dances and who should be responsible for cutting off the dancing.
I know lots of women who don't like to dance l alot of dances with the same people but are too shy to cut them off. then they complain that the guy wouldn't let them dance with anyone else.
On the other hand last night I cut off a session after 3 dances and the girl I was dancing with seemed dissapointed.
I guess this issue also varies as to whether the event is a dance scene(like a salsa night) or a pick-up scene, like a latin night.
Any thoughts . . .
 
Glad you had a great time here. Are you sure that was three songs, considering how I know Robertas likes to run those songs together. There have been times I just kept dancing and didn't realize four songs had passed. :) :)

But yes, what is the salsa etiquette on this?
 
I did have a good time, my only complaint was way too much Bachata, I can be ok with too much merengue but I feel uncomfortable dancing bachata with people when there is no romantic conotation.
It was actually more like 2.5 songs, the first one was only half a merengue. Also it may have been that I cut off right before the third of a salsa set.
 
I say either party can cut if off whenever they want to. Although it seems as if it's a bit less rude when the guy does it, especially if he's the one who asked the lady to dance... Don't quote me on that though. Anyway I say up to about 4 songs is cool. Last night I did a bachata and two salsa with one girl. I was kinda hogging her cuz there were no other follows around :)
 
hmm.. never consider that issue.. but thats maybe because i never had or consider having more than two dances after one another with the same salsera.. i like change and variety.. i think it serves well because it keeps me more pumped or enthused for the dance .. got to keep the urge going .. much more fun for me that way.
 
I rarely ask someone who's just danced with me for another dance, unless it's one of my favourite leaders and the song happens to be also my favourite. Even on such occasions, I usually just go look for another of my favourites.
If the leader asks for another dance straight away (which happens fairly regularly), and if the first dance was either short (not getting a full song) or very good, or if the leader is one of my favourites or friends, I agree to dance (otherwise, I thank the leader and leave before he has a chance to ask for another). There are also times when two songs sort of merge together so we don't realise that a song has ended and another has started. When this happens I carry on dancing even after realising that it's a new song.

I make a point of avoiding three dances in a row -- I get a bit suspicious of the guy's motivation when he asks for a third dance, so I say "maybe later" and leave the dancefloor. I've broken this "no third dance rule" only twice so far. Once when the second song (to which I did agree) and the third ran together and I didn't realise it until too late; and another time when I was a visiting out-of-towner and the leader and I connected really well -- since it was unlikely that we'd ever meet again, I was happy to break the rule.

As long as dances are spaced out, I don't have a problem dancing 3 or more songs with the same leader over the course of a night. I don't say no unless I have a reason, so if I'm asked, I dance.

The above applies to salsa, by the way. At milongas I dance 3 consecutive songs with each leader, which seems to be an AT tradition (see Differences in etiquette and The three-dance rule).
 
It all depends on the person and the mood for me. Typically, if a dance goes well I observe how my partner is doing and if she seems open to dancing another I ask her. Many times, I'm afraid that the next dance won't be as good as the last, or if it went bad its time to switch partners.

As there are very few women where I go Salsa dancing, we get a lot of leaders who hog the ladies. Usually I see them dancing 3, 4 or 5 dances in a row, especially if the girl is cute and they are trying to "one up" another Salsero. I had that happen once...I danced a Bachata with a girl I hadn't seen in months and another guy stepped in and danced with her for about 20 minutes straight. Most the time the women seem ok with this, but a lot of times they don't. I think more ladies need to set their boundaries...but I've observed that many like all this attention...well if the shoe fits wear it I guess. :?

I think most of this happens since people are trying to hook up or impress someone, but the most dances I ever do in a row is 3. Conversely, if it is a lady that I'm really attracted to, I just dance one or two, I don't want to come on too strong or give her the wrong idea. The dance floor is to dance...any kind of romance or asking out should take place elsewhere.

Its kind of like the rule with dips...don't do dips on the social floor, don't dance more than 3 times - "unless you're trying to impress some lady you're trying to seduce, then do whatever you want!" :x :roll:

Ok, enough ranting. ;)

SG
 
I'm gonna be contrary & tell SG (plus everyone else here :wink: ) how much I love dips (space permitted, of course) :lol: !

Ok, back to the topic.........

The no-more-than-3-dances rule applies to strangers/people we don't know very well.

I go over three with my dance partners, SOs or really good friends.

In fact, I've been doing it a lot these days because of my tendonitis (I stick to safe partners). Today, I was just about to begin a 4th or 5th song with a good friend of mine, when another women ran up, grabbed him, and told me: "NO!"

:oops: I didn't realise I was hogging a great lead on a very leader-short night :shock: :oops: !!!!!!
 
salsachinita said:
I'm gonna be contrary & tell SG (plus everyone else here :wink: ) how much I love dips (space permitted, of course) :lol: !
Click to expand...

There are dips and then there are dips. :wink: Small dips can often be done. :)
 
Sagitta said:
salsachinita said:
I'm gonna be contrary & tell SG (plus everyone else here :wink: ) how much I love dips (space permitted, of course) :lol: !
Click to expand...

There are dips and then there are dips. :wink: Small dips can often be done. :)
Click to expand...

I may as well start another thread on this... but all you gotta do is wear a slinky outfit with the words "dip me" across the bust. ;)
 
I'm gonna be contrary & tell SG (plus everyone else here ) how much I love dips (space permitted, of course) !
Click to expand...

Now be specific here SC, what kinds of dips? Ranch, bean, nacho, hummus? Or are you referring to slow witted dance partners? :lol: :D :lol:

*Ahem* - A more serious question, you mentioned the 3 dance rule applies to people you don't know that well (I agree with you on that!), but does the same apply for dips? I've asked some of the females I know any many have mentioned they will only allow someone they've danced with a lot to dip them.

My other post referred more to guys who dance 10 times with someone they just met and then put them through neck drops and more of those crazy maneuvers that look more like Cornish Wrestling than Salsa. Of course that needs no further explanation... :oops: :P

SG
 
salsachinita said:
Today, I was just about to begin a 4th or 5th song with a good friend of mine, when another women ran up, grabbed him, and told me: "NO!"

:oops: I didn't realise I was hogging a great lead on a very leader-short night :shock: :oops: !!!!!!
Click to expand...

:lol: SC I had a similar experience once :lol: . The guy and I had danced together a lot previously and for some reason, this particular evening, we were dancing, one dance after another, and another, and another. He was married but his wife didn't dance and didn't mind him going out dancing by himself. He knew that he was safe with me :wink: so we were just dancing away. This lady, who I had never seen before at the venue, literally comes onto the dancefloor before the song comes to a complete finish, taps him on the shoulder and asks for a dance :shock: :lol: He was like, no. (He didn't want to dance with many people that night for some reason) and I was like, go on :wink: I have been there, new to a venue, not knowing anyone and dying for a dance.

He danced with her and then came back to me and said, that's it. Not dancing with anyone else tonight. :oops: :lol:

Generally, if the dance chemistry was good, I will have more than one dance or three with the guy. Luckily, I have never had a situation where subsequent dances were not as good as the first one. As my partners in crime were, well, my partners in crime :lol: I think they felt the same too. :banana:
 
scorpionguy said:
Now be specific here SC, what kinds of dips?

My other post referred more to guys who dance 10 times with someone they just met and then put them through neck drops and more of those crazy maneuvers that look more like Cornish Wrestling than Salsa. Of course that needs no further explanation... :oops: :P
Click to expand...

Ok, aside from food or mental kinds of dips, I don't mean the fancy tricky acrobatic stuff :lol: :lol: !

Sure, I will do them with the partners whom I trust. With people I don't know well or just met, I don't expect to be dipped for the first song generally. If it happens (& hopfully it's a basic one) I will happily follow providing it was excuted well. The subsequent dances I would be more comfortable to being dipped, as long as they were excuted properly.
 
Pacion said:
As my partners in crime were, well, my partners in crime :lol: I think they felt the same too. :banana:
Click to expand...

So are mine 8) ......unless the boys are in 'hunting' mode. In which cases I make sure I'm not in the way :wink: .

-----sign: SC who is not usually the object being hunted down for reasons other than dancing :lol: :P ......!
 
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