Passion, what are the limits?
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Lilly_of_the_valley
Well-Known Member
His behavior was inappropriate and uncalled for. But as long as a woman made it clear that she did not care for his advances, and as long as he does not insist, I do not see a reason to ostracize him.
However, if soliciting sex is the main reason this guy is dancing, then yes, soon he will be reduced to preying on unsuspecting beginners.
pascal
Active Member
Why so. If the lady had been in a different mood then it would have ended otherwise. And you cannot know the mood unless you ask.
In our community we had a more serious case, a guy who learned tango to approach rich widows/divorced followers, marry them and kill them. Funnily enough, the forum where it was most discussed (long afterwards, when he was released from jail) belongs to the tango association where he learned the dance.
Assume nothing as the default position. Don't ask - if she was interested she would let you know. So you don't have to make a complete prat/pervert (delete as applicable) of yourself by pestering all and sundry.
I suppose that was a tiny bit more serious. Not much, though.
Dave Bailey
Active Member
??
Are you talking about Henri Désiré Landru? Because if so, he was executed. In 1922. I'm unaware of any other French serial killers who would even vaguely fit that profile. Sounds like a bit of an urban myth to me...
Joe
Forum Master
Sure, because women always make it clear what they want from men, and men always understand what it is that women want.
pascal
Active Member
??
Are you talking about Henri Désiré Landru? Because if so, he was executed. In 1922. I'm unaware of any other French serial killers who would even vaguely fit that profile. Sounds like a bit of an urban myth to me...
October 2008. Not a Landru though.
pascal
Active Member
Better if we do the asking rather than her. Even by your own "asking is bad" viewpoint.
Speculation?
Even where no interest at all is shown by the lady but a question is still asked?
Based on what people tell me alot will depend on who the guy is.
I don't think so, necessarily. It hands back the control of the situation to men. Although, in a different, femocentric world I would have to worry about offending leaders' delicate sensibilities before suggesting sex at the end of every tanda in the hopes of scoring a hit, of course.
Heh heh, true enough. But all the more reason for men to learn to read subtle signals before wading in where angels fear to tread.Sure, because women always make it clear what they want from men, and men always understand what it is that women want.
Dave Bailey
Active Member
Can you PM me the name of this person? I don't want to derail the thread...
Dave Bailey
Active Member
Being brutal, why should they bother?
Yes, in an ideal world, men and women should communicate better and both should work on understanding each other.
But milongas are typically woman-heavy; men are the ones with most of the influence, they don't need to learn subtle signals. So the onus is more on the woman to make signals more obvious.
Lilly_of_the_valley
Well-Known Member
OK, I am sorry, I should have said " My impression from her post was that the woman on the receiving end of his behavior perceived it as inappropriate and uncalled for."
Pascal, how many women that guy killed? And after how many years they released him from prison?
Pascal, how many women that guy killed? And after how many years they released him from prison?
Lilly_of_the_valley
Well-Known Member
"As long as he does not insist" means "the question is not still asked". He asked once, she refused, end of story. In some cultures he may be expected to repeat his advances after several "no"s in order to succeed. In the US, as far as I know, "no" means "no".
Based on my experience, guys (and women) constantly looking for sex are not the most popular dancers in the community, and rely a lot on the newcomers to get dances. But I understand, "your mileage may vary".