Tango as it crosses over with the relationships, seduction and sexuality

[opendoor]

..dance communities.. contra, swing, zydeco ..all done away with that "rule"..

Good so. My main milongas are very formal and finicky. If I were to verbally ask another woman after a public rejection, she would look at me indignantly. A princess can never be a second choice, can she?
The nice thing about the Forró Communitie is that there are no such rules of behavior. Everyone is just there to dance and have fun.

 

[Toad]

The nice thing about the Forró Communitie is that there are no such rules of behavior. Everyone is just there to dance and have fun.

I once found myself in Horta ( in the Azores ) where I found a Forró dance weekend happening by walking by the venue. I was accepted as a new dancer very warmly. A very joyful group of people.

 

[EricInPitt]

How many songs are in a ballroom set of dances? Does it variate?

Just the one song typically. Vary rarely are there "sets" of songs where you dance with the same person.

As an aside, I am going to propose doing "rounds" based on the various competition dances at my local clubs dances. We have four colleges in town, and they all have ballroom dance clubs. USA Dance just announced that their national championship will be held here in Pittsburgh in April 2022. I'm betting that a lot of them are going to want to qualify for Nationals. So I'm thinking to help the college kids, if we do "rounds" it will give them chances to practice the dances they will be doing in competition. We also only charge them $5 to come to our dances which can be a $15-20 savings for them versus the non-member rates.

 

[itwillhappen]

At least here in Pittsburgh what works for organizing a dance, except with the AT crowd, is to show up, walk around the room, and ask someone if they'd like to dance.

Even a "walkaceo" is much more pleasant and effective, especially for shy people. You go and look around 3-5 meters away for some suitable dance partners who, in turn, look interested. And only when your subtle nod is answered, then you walk the last 3-5 meters to her.

 

[Brummbaer]

Even a "walkaceo" is much more pleasant and effective, especially for shy people. You go and look around 3-5 meters away for some suitable dance partners who, in turn, look interested. And only when your subtle nod is answered, then you walk the last 3-5 meters to her.

All of these Would you like to dance? options ultimately depend on the environment. Cabeceo/mirada would be my preferred approach, with the proviso on lighting, visibility, positioning, time, crowd, etc. for it to work. As mentioned previously, it also depends on the type of milonga, ranging from practica, through practicalonga, to a very formal milonga event trying to emulate some past era in another culture.

Failing the option for cabeceo/mirada, as you say, walk round and walkaceo, with the proviso of not stumbling through tables, chairs and people milling around. It can fail on the 'embarrassment' side since it can be a fairly obvious request seen by everyone present. I don't have a problem with a direct request if there are few other options because of the environment and circumstances, nor that either party can invite.

I pretty much go with: Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others. Just use whatever is the norm for that location and event.

 

[Tangogal]

The great advantage to growing older is that I no longer care so much. If I say no to a dance it's because I don't want to dance with that person at that time. I no longer agonize about how hurt their feelings might be. It's a dance no need to set myself on fire to keep others warm!

In particular I will not be removing my coat and putting my dance shoes back on because "we didn't get to dance yet". You missed your chance buddy!

 

[Cabbit]

In particular I will not be removing my coat and putting my dance shoes back on because "we didn't get to dance yet". You missed your chance buddy!

Those people for whom it would be worth removing the coat and putting dance shoes back on would be most unlikely to ask for such thing.

 

[Greybeard]

Isn't that tango etiquette, too? I don't know it any other way.

I limited my comment to ballroom only because I'm not sure other communities follow the same rule.

And the excuse "I promised this dance to ..." is respecting the prior commitment and wouldn't be taken badly. (I would also try to find an opportunity to dance with the requesting lady later that evening.)

 

[Gssh]

It gives me something more to think on, than the glib, shallow, and condescending answer that I find "It's what's they do in BA" to be.

As a sidenote: I don't think this is as glib/shallow/condescending an answer as it appears to be on the first glance. BA has a lot of social dancing, and it seems to work well and has been sustainable (there are some structural oddities that are happening due to most milongas today being two events layered on top of each other - a social dance, and a tourist attraction, and these events have quite different dynamics and different (thought sometimes overlapping) participants. So BA is a reasonable model of how to organize social dances for tango.

Overall i don't see that communities that change this proven recipe to something else have dancers that get more, or more satisfying dances, and i tend to experience cabeceoing milongas as more relaxed - but that might be confounded with what these communities look like to begin with.

 

[Brummbaer]

i tend to experience cabeceoing milongas as more relaxed

Interesting. I too find that cabeceo works in a more relaxed atmosphere. Maybe a myth of a 'relaxing' milonga in BsAs.

My experience in Europe is that they can be more frenetic - just to get in as many tandas with as many partners as possible. If they're more formal and relaxed, and attempting to emulate the culture, then cabeceo/mirada works well.

 

[Cabbit]

That depends also on the length of the milonga. Longer milonga, more relaxed. So, you have time to be late, eat dinner, talk with people, match music to favourite dancers, sit and watch...

 

[Mr. Moustachio]

Tango was isolated during World War 2 and during the communist regime in Argentina

When was the communist regime in Argentina?

 

[Brummbaer]

When was the communist regime in Argentina?

Yeah, I missed that. I thought Argentina alternated between military dictatorships and attempts at democracy, but one person's 'socialist' is another's 'communist'. Pugliese, the composer and orchestra leader, was a communist who was often arrested for his politics.

 

[tangobro]

When was the communist regime in Argentina?

Wikipedia says since 1918

Communist Party of Argentina - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

 

[Brummbaer]

Wikipedia says since 1918

Communist Party of Argentina - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

Hmm, on that basis a year before the USA became a a communist regime in 1919.

The foundation of a party does not make a regime, in the sense of government in power.

For many years Argentina had military dictatorships, sometimes regarded as populist far-right, some with the support of the left for overthrowing the preceding regime. A complex relationship between far-right 'fascist' dictatorships and 'communist' authoritarian regimes.

I must do some more research on the political history since it keeps re-appearing following the 1982 war between the UK and Argentina over the Falklands - and the subsequent demise of the military dictatorship in Argentina. Not forgetting 'The Missing' of that regime in the late 1970's until 1983. Was it under that regime that AT was suppressed?

Under 'relationships' I do recollect some comments about learning an AT influenced dance back in 1982, and of course the Malvinas/Falklands do crop up in discussion in the UK.