Teaching partner connection to a beginner

[IndySpinner]

What methods have various teachers had success with when teaching new dancers the elements of partner connection? In my particular situation, my girlfriend is just learning mambo/salsa. She has non-partner dance experience. She really wants to dance with me, but when we dance at the club the connection in both the open and closed holds is wildly erratic and is basically a mess! I want her to have an enjoyable experience dancing, but she must learn to calm her arms down. I eventually want her to accompany me to my ballroom lessons, but until she lives closer and has the time, I will be trying to do my best without her becoming frustrated with me! Any suggestions would be appreciated!

 

[Chris Stratton]

What methods have various teachers had success with when teaching new dancers the elements of partner connection? In my particular situation, my girlfriend is just learning mambo/salsa. She has non-partner dance experience. She really wants to dance with me, but when we dance at the club the connection in both the open and closed holds is wildly erratic and is basically a mess! I want her to have an enjoyable experience dancing, but she must learn to calm her arms down. I eventually want her to accompany me to my ballroom lessons, but until she lives closer and has the time, I will be trying to do my best without her becoming frustrated with me! Any suggestions would be appreciated!

Is the problem

- a desire to be musically expressive with her arms?

- putting her feet in places that make maintaining a connection impractical?

- or is it actually and simply a lack of connection?

 

[Joy In Motion]

Chris' questions are good ones to ask. I would say it is natural in the beginning for the lady to lack "connection" (which is a very broad term that includes a variety of things). A couple of basics that you typically want to address in the very beginning before you can really move on to learning anything else... keeping some tension in the arms so she can feel leads from a partner (and from there allowing that tension to translate into the movement of the body instead of just allowing her arms to collapse), following her wrist when determining which way to turn (or whether to stay in place as with a waterfall), and allowing the hold to fall into a natural position instead of trying to force a preconceived notion of what proper hold looks like. As far as body mechanics go, trying to keep the upper body still and yet not stiff is very important. When I tell ladies that doing this is important to allow the hips to swing underneath like a pendulum, they typically get the idea and start to do better. With the calm upper body typically comes a relaxed and natural carriage of the arms and hands. Keeping the hands close to the belly button in open hold when they are not being held by the partner is also important.

I would say that adjusting to the hold and style of a leader takes time, especially when you are dancing with multiple partners. Learning not to fight to leader and to just become an extension of the frame they are offering can be difficult for some ladies, and it varies greatly depending on who the leader is. Some leaders have holds that feel very unnatural and even uncomfortable to followers.

These basics should offer enough at the beginning level to have enjoyable dances with leaders of any level. I would start there. As an instructor, though, I must say that I have never encountered a single lady whom I could not comfortably lead the very basic steps with after a single class. I'm not sure if maybe you are trying to lead moves that she is not ready for, but you may want to consider what you are asking her to do as well. If she is having difficulty with the steps, try dancing merengue with her to just focus on her connection and a basic side-to-side rhythm so she won't have to be concerned about much footwork.

If you don't know the basics of connection from a follower's perspective, maybe it would be a good idea to have an experienced follower from your dance scene give her some pointers. If she is interested in learning, it might be a good idea for her to take a class or two anyway to make her feel more confident.

 

[Leonid Turetsky]

Hey,

Great question.

ESPECIALLY in Salsa the girls must have very soft arms. The arms must be very light to be able to do all the turns, hooks, hair drapes in a quick music tempo.... if they aren't, it can be dangerous for both parties...

As for the body, I teach it be quite toned and stretched upwards. Because she still needs to be able to do spins very quickly and so the center still needs to be engaged all the time.

As for teaching methods for the arms:
The more her arms become tense, the more RELAXED YOUR ARMS BECOME... Sometimes followers will feel the change and adapt.

Another way is to dance as the follower with her and show her exactly how it FEELS when her arms are tense.

What methods have various teachers had success with when teaching new dancers the elements of partner connection? In my particular situation, my girlfriend is just learning mambo/salsa. She has non-partner dance experience. She really wants to dance with me, but when we dance at the club the connection in both the open and closed holds is wildly erratic and is basically a mess! I want her to have an enjoyable experience dancing, but she must learn to calm her arms down. I eventually want her to accompany me to my ballroom lessons, but until she lives closer and has the time, I will be trying to do my best without her becoming frustrated with me! Any suggestions would be appreciated!

 

[IndySpinner]

Thanks for the smart replies! My description does leave something to be desired. In an open position, she typically tenses her arms too tightly, and is trying to move her body and hips alot. However, every little movement gets translated into her arms creating a very noisy, erratic and irregular push and pull connection. This happens even during the forward and back basic. The connection needs to be much quieter if she is to properly receive my lead signals. I've tried to tell her to keep her arms very relaxed with just a little tone for now. She gets frustrated when I tell her that her arms are too strong and need to be more relaxed. When she relaxes them, she goes too far and then her arms become limp.

Like I said, she is new to partner dancing, and I'd like her to start out with the right fundamentals. To me, a nice connection is by far the most important element in making dance enjoyable!!

 

[Albanaich]

You get this in some beginners in MJ, (which has some similarities to Salsa) what I suspect she is trying to do is use her arms to hold the rhythm, which I expect is what she does when not partner dancing (ask her to dance on her own and see what she does with her arms) .

When you start leading its puts her timing out and everything ends up horriblly jerky and inconsistent because your lead with throws her of beat.

It's actually a good indicator of strong sense of rhythm, she's trying to stay on time but in doing so is throwing herself out because she doesn't understand the partner element.

I've got round it in the past by slowly walking through WCS left and right side passes to show that the lead should be smooth and that she doesn't need to jerk her arm in time to the music.

It will take time for her overcome the habit, but I think you'll find you've got someone with a strong underlying sense of rhythm

 

[Albanaich]

If she's trying to hold the rhythm in her arms there's a particularl feel to it, sort of like having a large fish on the end of the line/connection. You'll feel these sort of random bounces in her arms as she trys to recover her timing.

Instead of keeping time by tapping her foot, she moves her arms, when you lead her, you basically stop her doing that and she can't recover her timing, so if there is any change in your lead she will try and move her arms to get back on time.

That's when you get this wierd random bouncing sensation, sort of like a freshly hooked fish, every time your lead lets up, her arms are trying to make break for it

When you ask her to 'soften the connection' she interprets that as 'don't move your arms' which means (at the physical level) don't dance to the music - so there's nothing there to dance with. You've got to explain that she's go to use her arms to communicate with you rather than the music.

 

[IndySpinner]

Albanaich, I think that you have correctly identified her underlying issue! She has even said that she is trying to dance to the rhythm, and doesn't understand how to feel the rhythm if she can't move her body the way she wants to. I like your "hooked fish" analogy, with a weird, random bouncing sensation. Thank you, I think I will approach working with her from that point of view. I do know a little WCS and I agree that it just might help her understand how to dance with a smoother connection.

I've re-educated myself with the instructional information on Ballroom Dancers.com, which I think is a nicely written regarding partnering connection and lead and follow: http://www.ballroomdancers.com/Learning_Center/Lesson/3/

Thanks again, and please if anyone else has input I would appreciate hearing it!

 

[samina]

it takes awhile to learn even what that "connection" is when you've never partner-danced, how to give your energy to someone else, and how to modulate it. some exercises showing her what this and how she can find it may help her acquire some sensitivity to it.

 

[Albanaich]

If you explain to her that she can't move her arms to the beat because you need them to communicate to her where you are going put her she might have a better idea of what the problem is.

The simple WCS moves work because she free to express the rhythm through her body as she moves back and forth in the slot, she just can't do it through the arms.

Which is basically the problem, you need to get her to learn to isolate her arms from the rhythm that she is feeling.

She can move everything else , but she can't move her arms you need them to communicate direction. . . .

It must of been a bit scary for you, because the first time you encounter this the reaction is that the person has no sense of rhythm at all because the movements don't have any connection to what you are trying to achieve. It's actually the opposite, they are just having difficulty isolating the rhythm from different parts of their body.

You might get her to look at some video's of Irish step dancers - they have perfect rhythm and dance control - but they don't move their arms.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NnTq52YXXzc&feature=related

And, amusingly, this. . . .

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ce4mwLAAF8

 

[wonderwoman]

^ Very good post, I found it helpful

 

[Albanaich]

On another note, if she has a very strong sense of rhythm, its going to make ballroom quite difficult for her, you might find is easier doing WCS/Lindy Hop which is more encouraging of rhythmic expression.

Once you've ironed out the lead follow issues in Swing, then try Ballroom.

 

[samina]

If you explain to her that she can't move her arms to the beat because you need them to communicate to her where you are going put her she might have a better idea of what the problem is.

The simple WCS moves work because she free to express the rhythm through her body as she moves back and forth in the slot, she just can't do it through the arms.

Which is basically the problem, you need to get her to learn to isolate her arms from the rhythm that she is feeling.

She can move everything else , but she can't move her arms you need them to communicate direction. . . .

It must of been a bit scary for you, because the first time you encounter this the reaction is that the person has no sense of rhythm at all because the movements don't have any connection to what you are trying to achieve. It's actually the opposite, they are just having difficulty isolating the rhythm from different parts of their body.

huh. can't say this sits right with me exactly. arms can be free for expression, and i think that arms hanging like deadweights at one's sides, as in the irish dancing example, is hardly ideal in partner dancing.

i would tend rather to convey to a beginner that there is a connection felt between the hands, going all the way down through one's arms, to one's core and out through one's feet into the ground... pay attention to this connection through the hands and listen with the fingers and with your core, and that's where a more alive, sensitive connection starts to emerge. keeping the arms relaxed helps to "hear".

course, i'm no instructor...i may be off. but that's what has developed that sensitivity for me.

if the arms are active in the wrong places, then the hands certainly won't be available to feel...but i don't think inactive arms is a permanent solution.

 

[Albanaich]

I'm not disagreeing with what you are saying Samina - but that's an issue to be dealt with after she's learnt to isolate her arms from the rhythm she feels in her body.

Nothing much can been done if she's randomly pushing and pulling her arms trying to keep time with the music. That's got to be fixed first before you can attempt developing any kind of connection.

Irish step dancing is an example of the fact that you don't need the arms to hold the beat and rhythm.

 

[jennyisdancing]

I'm not disagreeing with what you are saying Samina - but that's an issue to be dealt with after she's learnt to isolate her arms from the rhythm she feels in her body.

Nothing much can been done if she's randomly pushing and pulling her arms trying to keep time with the music. That's got to be fixed first before you can attempt developing any kind of connection.

Irish step dancing is an example of the fact that you don't need the arms to hold the beat and rhythm.

This is really interesting to me - I have a couple of friends who have started to try salsa dancing. They've only had the lessons before the dance and of course I encourage them to take regular studio classes. But meantime they're nervous about trying to dance with the guys just yet, so I offered to practice just the simple steps that I can lead, which are basic step, CBL and ladies' right turn. I noticed the issue described here with the 'noisy' arms but didn't know how to explain it to them.

Actually, now that I think of it, nobody ever explained to me that way either when I was first learning. It took a while to understand what to do, or not do, with my arms in the connection.