OK, first things first. DH is shorthand for "dear husband"--aka, how I refer to my SO (significant other) online. Or, if I'm pissed at him, "damned husband!"
Steve Pastor said:
This part of your post, Peaches, I like. "I've just got to work on consciously changing my weight correctly".
Like plenty of other things, *sigh*, I'm often doing things correctly (so I'm told). But my teacher's complaint at this time is that I'm not consistent, and I don't do things with an awareness of doing them.
Steve Pastor said:
For me, where I go next, or where I ask my partner to go next depends on where she is now. If I lead you to cross (or think I do) , but I can't feel where your leg went, or where your weight is,...?
Well, in this case, I'm definitely led into the cross, in terms of footwork, but I'm not led into the change of weight necessarily. Of course, there are times when he'll lead the cross to a change of weight, without moving anywhere. So, I guess the answer is, my weight is where YOU (the leader) left it. If you didn't ask me to transfer the weight to my crossed left foot, then I'm still standing on my right.
I guess part of is, maybe, trusting your follow to get her feet where you put them, and to leave her weight where you left it.
Steve Pastor said:
Anyhow, does it make sense that if you are following the man's center, you could end up with your weight either on your right foot, rr, if his center is a bit more to your right, on your crossed left foot?
To me, no. The lead's "center" than I'm following varies slightly from lead to lead. Some guys prefer to dance with no offset and shoulders parallel, my teacher, however prefers to dance with a slight offset and a slight opening between my right shoulder and his left (upper bodies form a slight "v" shape). So, based on how the man establishes his hold is how I define the center that I relate to.
I'm not going to adjust my steps based on where his center is in relation to mine, but, rather, adjust my steps to based on keeping the relativity to his center as he moves it.
Steve Pastor said:
And, if the man is being taught to wait for you to complete your steps, and you don't put weight on the crossed left foot, should he force you to do that by continuing to move towards you?
First of all, IMH beginner's O, the man should always be waiting for the woman to complete the step he has led--the key being what he has led. She can't very well follow if he's already leading step 2 if she's still in the process of completing step 1, for whatever reason. At the very minimum, her weight won't be where it needs to be to follow what he's asking--not to mention it's just bad leading to not be paying attention to your partner.
About the rest of the statement... Speaking just for myself, with what I've been taught... It depends on what the lead wants. If he is wanting her weight to be on the crossed left, and she hasn't put it there (I wouldn't), I suppose he could "force it." How to force could, I suppose, be debated. Some people move forward, others use a rotational lead. Whichever.
On the other hand, if you know (as a lead) that what you're asking for works fine out of the cross, and you trust your follower...let her stay there. It's a very easy motion to transfer that weight and "pop out" the right leg when the weight is transferred.
Steve Pastor said:
P.S. to Peaches - Yes, of course. Let's dance! I have lots of patience for people who are making an effort.
Sweet! I can't remember where my sibs-in-law are, exactly, but either way they're close, relative to where I am on the East Coast!