+1
I strive...not that strive is the right word, but I can't think of another offhand...to follow actively and actively surrender. Every time I dance. It could be a terminology thing, since they're both fuzzy concepts. By actively surrender I guess i mean to be in the moment,, and wholly immersed in the dance and the music and my partner and to forget the whole world. By following actively I mean that I'm listening to and engaging with the music. I can surrender to my leader's leading...and still assert myself. Lapiz, hooks, taps...how I hold my body...how I take a step... Becoming a 3-D representation of the music. All while surrendering.
Anyway. This past week I got surrendering experience where I didn't assert myself anymore than what I mentioned above. and then one leader took that bit and responded to it, and I felt I was able to, if not hijack, then at least assert and suggest. And it was wonderful, for both of us (unless he was lying). Just simple things, like making drawing out the timing of a step that was suggested but not forced (marked versus led?). Stiffening a bit to suggest holding for another beat. Softening to suggest a more lyrical approach. Really playing with something to show that I like a particular move, and hoping he gets the point and plays with it some more. This leader took the suggestions and ran with them. So wonderful.