ProgressNotPerfection
Forum Master
I double-dog dare you to do it!But now, I'm starting to think about quacking at him, during underarm turns, and see what he does!
funniest thing a coach has ever said about your dancing
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Wait until the last possible second after you have just finished your showcase routine. When he bows, shout, "QUACK!"I've only been dancing for a year now. But, just tonight, my instructor told me that I tend to be very "ducky", meaning that I tend to instinctively duck my head, when he leads me through underarm turns in smooth and rhythm. I was a very clumsy little girl and knocked myself on the head a lot, by not watching where I was going, and it's just become instinctual for me. I cracked up when he called it "ducky." I've seen myself do it, on video playback or photos, so I know that it's something that I have to work at improving. But now, I'm starting to think about quacking at him, during underarm turns, and see what he does!
ProgressNotPerfection
Forum Master
Instruction from IFP (about getting into proper waltz frame): “raise your left elbow higher. And offer the audience your left armpit. Think of light shining out from your armpit.”
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Years ago in this thread, someone said that they would be horrified by what seemed to them to be inappropriate comments made by coaches & pros. There were many responses to that with which I agree, about needing to hear them in context to understand them, and how important humor is in lessons that are often stressful and intense, and how this is a sport that necessarily requires intimate body contact, so there’s nothing inappropriate about describing that body contact. Also, it’s obvious from reading this thread that many, many comments that sound off-color were not intended that way (although some of them clearly were).
My pro is in the category of extremely professional and gentlemanly. And while I admire his politeness, sometimes I feel like it actually slows us down. There have been several things where, when I finally figured out what was expected of me, I would have caught on much sooner if he had just said it directly - using words and descriptions that provide clear imagery, even if those descriptions were “earthy.” His determined efforts never to say anything that might be heard as innuendo are starting to frustrate me. FFS, I am NOT going to misinterpret something he says as a come-on. Surely that must be obvious to him by now. But I am a very direct person, and value that quality in others. His verbal dancing around the point, and avoiding the use of any terms or expressions that could conceivably be used in a “bedroom” setting, has become slightly annoying.
Dance lessons are like sports coaching. I need my sports coach to convey to me how to use all the various parts of my body, and preferably to do so using the shortest point between two distances. Sure, many of us often find our minds in the gutter on a regular basis, as demonstrated by the examples shown throughout this thread. And there’s nothing wrong with that. For example, in everyday life, I use Michael Scott’s punchline, “that’s what SHE said!” all the time (in response to completely neutral statements like “that didn’t take long,” or “wow, that’s big,” or “you’ll have to handle that yourself,” or “I’m not opening my mouth”).
But that doesn’t mean I think the speaker intended the comment that way. It just shows I enjoy wordplay and have no reluctance to express juvenile humor. It’s often fun to push the envelope, as long as you know when and when not to. There have been only two times I have visibly reacted to one of Pro’s comments. One is described above, when I laughed at his instruction to “spread your legs wider for me.” He was so mortified that it was obvious he wasn’t trying to be suggestive. The other time was when I forgot which direction to move when I tried a turning pattern by myself, but I could do it when he led. He said, “see? It’s much better with a partner.” I deadpanned, “yes...that’s true of many things.” He looked disconcerted, like he wasn’t sure if I meant what he thought it meant. (I didn’t clarify further.) But I felt bad for making him uncomfortable, so I have held my tongue since then. (“That’s what SHE said!”)
When we worked on rumba walks, freezing on each portion of the step & causing me to wobble violently several times, he said, “it gets a lot harder when you go slow.” I didn’t bat an eye or change my facial expression one millimeter. Of COURSE part of my mind jumped into the gutter and snickered, but I knew he didn’t mean anything beyond the difficulty of keeping my balance.
IFP is also professional, but she doesn’t hesitate to explain things by reference to body parts. “When your left hip goes back, your right chi chi should be facing front.” There’s no weird or uncomfortable vibe from that, and it tells me exactly what I need to do. Pro says things like, “pull your shoulder blades together in the back. Lean forward a bit more. The front of your torso should be tall.” This requires me to think hard about what I’m supposed to do, and he usually has to manually adjust my position to get it right. If he would just say, “stick your breasts up and forward,” we’d be done already and could move on! However, knowing him as I do, I suspect at least one of the reasons he does NOT give instructions like that is because he wants me to understand the mechanics of each movement, not just the final “look” to shoot for. If I just “stick them up and out,” it might look correct at that moment, but it wouldn’t be helping me learn how to use my back and abdominal muscles the way I should.
Anyway, things a coach will say are often funny BECAUSE they are unintended double entendres. They can be equally funny when intended as such, as long as both parties are on the same page WRT intent. Or sometimes they’re just funny because of an inside joke between you and a friend, of which the coach is unaware. Or sometimes you’re just in a silly mood after a long day or a difficult lesson and everything seems funny. So, personally, I enjoy this thread. I hope we can keep it up. (“That’s what SHE said!”)
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Years ago in this thread, someone said that they would be horrified by what seemed to them to be inappropriate comments made by coaches & pros. There were many responses to that with which I agree, about needing to hear them in context to understand them, and how important humor is in lessons that are often stressful and intense, and how this is a sport that necessarily requires intimate body contact, so there’s nothing inappropriate about describing that body contact. Also, it’s obvious from reading this thread that many, many comments that sound off-color were not intended that way (although some of them clearly were).
My pro is in the category of extremely professional and gentlemanly. And while I admire his politeness, sometimes I feel like it actually slows us down. There have been several things where, when I finally figured out what was expected of me, I would have caught on much sooner if he had just said it directly - using words and descriptions that provide clear imagery, even if those descriptions were “earthy.” His determined efforts never to say anything that might be heard as innuendo are starting to frustrate me. FFS, I am NOT going to misinterpret something he says as a come-on. Surely that must be obvious to him by now. But I am a very direct person, and value that quality in others. His verbal dancing around the point, and avoiding the use of any terms or expressions that could conceivably be used in a “bedroom” setting, has become slightly annoying.
Dance lessons are like sports coaching. I need my sports coach to convey to me how to use all the various parts of my body, and preferably to do so using the shortest point between two distances. Sure, many of us often find our minds in the gutter on a regular basis, as demonstrated by the examples shown throughout this thread. And there’s nothing wrong with that. For example, in everyday life, I use Michael Scott’s punchline, “that’s what SHE said!” all the time (in response to completely neutral statements like “that didn’t take long,” or “wow, that’s big,” or “you’ll have to handle that yourself,” or “I’m not opening my mouth”).
But that doesn’t mean I think the speaker intended the comment that way. It just shows I enjoy wordplay and have no reluctance to express juvenile humor. It’s often fun to push the envelope, as long as you know when and when not to. There have been only two times I have visibly reacted to one of Pro’s comments. One is described above, when I laughed at his instruction to “spread your legs wider for me.” He was so mortified that it was obvious he wasn’t trying to be suggestive. The other time was when I forgot which direction to move when I tried a turning pattern by myself, but I could do it when he led. He said, “see? It’s much better with a partner.” I deadpanned, “yes...that’s true of many things.” He looked disconcerted, like he wasn’t sure if I meant what he thought it meant. (I didn’t clarify further.) But I felt bad for making him uncomfortable, so I have held my tongue since then. (“That’s what SHE said!”)
When we worked on rumba walks, freezing on each portion of the step & causing me to wobble violently several times, he said, “it gets a lot harder when you go slow.” I didn’t bat an eye or change my facial expression one millimeter. Of COURSE part of my mind jumped into the gutter and snickered, but I knew he didn’t mean anything beyond the difficulty of keeping my balance.
IFP is also professional, but she doesn’t hesitate to explain things by reference to body parts. “When your left hip goes back, your right chi chi should be facing front.” There’s no weird or uncomfortable vibe from that, and it tells me exactly what I need to do. Pro says things like, “pull your shoulder blades together in the back. Lean forward a bit more. The front of your torso should be tall.” This requires me to think hard about what I’m supposed to do, and he usually has to manually adjust my position to get it right. If he would just say, “stick your breasts up and forward,” we’d be done already and could move on! However, knowing him as I do, I suspect at least one of the reasons he does NOT give instructions like that is because he wants me to understand the mechanics of each movement, not just the final “look” to shoot for. If I just “stick them up and out,” it might look correct at that moment, but it wouldn’t be helping me learn how to use my back and abdominal muscles the way I should.
Anyway, things a coach will say are often funny BECAUSE they are unintended double entendres. They can be equally funny when intended as such, as long as both parties are on the same page WRT intent. Or sometimes they’re just funny because of an inside joke between you and a friend, of which the coach is unaware. Or sometimes you’re just in a silly mood after a long day or a difficult lesson and everything seems funny. So, personally, I enjoy this thread. I hope we can keep it up. (“That’s what SHE said!”)
bry_dancer
Well-Known Member
Some recent favorites from my pro:
- "Dont follow me, drive straight between my legs!"
- "I want to feel your ribs on top of mine!"
- "When establishing your frame you need to leave room for a lady and a pair of boobs!"
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ProgressNotPerfection
Forum Master
(After I kept repeatedly messing up bolero parallels)
“There’s nothing you’re doing wrong. It’s just...you’re not doing what you’re supposed to.”
“There’s nothing you’re doing wrong. It’s just...you’re not doing what you’re supposed to.”
rhythmflavoredsmoothie
Member
im sorry but why is this gold because I relate too well w my coach
ProgressNotPerfection
Forum Master
Pro’s summation of my east coast swing: “remember, no step should look accidental.”
At the same lesson, he said, “you feel very solid on the basic step. But when I move you into other combinations, it’s like - like - as if I threw you out of the car, and you’re floundering to find me again.”
At the same lesson, he said, “you feel very solid on the basic step. But when I move you into other combinations, it’s like - like - as if I threw you out of the car, and you’re floundering to find me again.”
ceterisparibus
Member
"How would you grade yourself on the waltz steps you just did?"
"A D-?"
"Oh, that's generous."
"A D-?"
"Oh, that's generous."
ProgressNotPerfection
Forum Master
After Pro led me through a new pattern involving a lot of fast traveling across the floor:
“Hey! You see how fast you moved your feet? You almost stayed with me all the way through!”
“So that was good?” I asked, hopefully.
“Yes! I mean, it was nothing like what I wanted you to do, but at least your legs kept your body moving with me the whole time.”
“Hey! You see how fast you moved your feet? You almost stayed with me all the way through!”
“So that was good?” I asked, hopefully.
“Yes! I mean, it was nothing like what I wanted you to do, but at least your legs kept your body moving with me the whole time.”
ProgressNotPerfection
Forum Master
During rumba practice, I started to lose my balance as I came out of a spin, so I supported myself by pushing hard against his bicep to keep from falling over. This made him lose HIS balance, and he stumbled to catch himself. Looking at me exasperatedly, he said, “you’re supposed to turn off your core, not off my arm.”
Last week, my pro told me he really liked my elbow that day. Others might not have laughed at that. But it made me think of Katisha from the Mikado https://www.gsarchive.net/mikado/webopera/mk207d.html
Katisha. You hold that I am not beautiful because my face is plain. But you know nothing; you are still unenlightened. Learn, then, that it is not in the face alone that beauty is to be sought. My face is unattractive!
Pooh-Bah. It is.
Katisha. But I have a left shoulder-blade that is a miracle of loveliness. People come miles to see it. My right elbow has a fascination that few can resist.
Katisha. You hold that I am not beautiful because my face is plain. But you know nothing; you are still unenlightened. Learn, then, that it is not in the face alone that beauty is to be sought. My face is unattractive!
Pooh-Bah. It is.
Katisha. But I have a left shoulder-blade that is a miracle of loveliness. People come miles to see it. My right elbow has a fascination that few can resist.
Warren J. Dew
Forum Master
We had a visiting coach look at our routines. His comment on our American style Viennese Waltz: "The problem with that routine is, it's impossible for humans."
ProgressNotPerfection
Forum Master
(In reference to my smooth frame): “your head should feel like it’s crowning.”
Ummmm....
Ummmm....