Milonga codes of Buenos Aires accepted in Hong Kong milonga
- Thread starter jantango
- Start date
hbboogie1
New Member
I think we’re all missing the point here. In order to understand the cabeceo we need to know somethng about where it came from. The cabeceo is something that’s very much a part of argentine culture, part of the body language or non verbal communication commonly used in every day life. This gesture indicates “wanna go?” or “let’s go” , how ‘bout it?”and was common long before it became “cabeceo” on the dance floor. So, it is not some hugely important “dance code”, it is just a way argentine’s communicate.
Lui
Active Member
The assumption are part of the game, like in poker. But you don’t have to play, not even in Bs.As.. Go to the practica before the milonga, get known to the other attendees, afterwards share some common table at the milonga, chat with the women at your table and invite them.
I don’t know why cabezeo seems to trouble you so much, as long as you neither have to use it nor want to try it.
I don’t know why cabezeo seems to trouble you so much, as long as you neither have to use it nor want to try it.
Captain Jep
Active Member
Oh, for crissakes, just grow a pair and ASK what she means, already!
Only if she puts her glasses back on before I ask the question ...
Light Sleeper
New Member
The assumption are part of the game, like in poker. But you don’t have to play, not even in Bs.As.. Go to the practica before the milonga, get known to the other attendees, afterwards share some common table at the milonga, chat with the women at your table and invite them.
I don’t know why cabezeo seems to trouble you so much, as long as you neither have to use it nor want to try it.
Lui, would you describe your technique as 'semi-cabazeo' or is it just 'non-verbal' invitation or is any non-verbal invitation a 'cabazeo'. I think my mind has overload, now!
And in places where cabazeo is the de facto method of invitation - do women invite men or is it always a case of the woman making herself 'available' but waits for the man to initiate?
Captain Jep
Active Member
There'll usually be a tanda where the ladies get the chance to invite the men.
Yes usually its the women making herself "available". As in life so in dance ...
Lui
Active Member
@ Light Sleeper
hbboogie1 gave the best explanation:
...men and women pretty much invite each other by fishing for glances. Imagine this: You are, for some strange reasons, among the top most desirable male dancers and your dancing your first set that evening. As soon as your view travels towards the tables, it will be greeted by a wall of luring stares and sweet but razor sharp smiles, that clearly state: Don’t waste your time with her! The next tanda you better get your a.. over here! It’s quite obvious which woman want to dance!
(I do not claim to have achieved this result at Bs.As.’ top milongas myself!)
hbboogie1 gave the best explanation:
I tried to encourage the guys to play around with the cabeceo. It's fun. Therefore, I was suggesting to try a cabezado on their way for a normal verbal invitation. In case of a successful cabeceo, any further invitation would be obsolete. If the women are totally ignorant of any cabeceo, they would not spend their night sitting and starring. It’s rather a cabeceo with a Plan B. BTW cabeceo is just the Spanish word for nodding.
...men and women pretty much invite each other by fishing for glances. Imagine this: You are, for some strange reasons, among the top most desirable male dancers and your dancing your first set that evening. As soon as your view travels towards the tables, it will be greeted by a wall of luring stares and sweet but razor sharp smiles, that clearly state: Don’t waste your time with her! The next tanda you better get your a.. over here! It’s quite obvious which woman want to dance!
(I do not claim to have achieved this result at Bs.As.’ top milongas myself!)
Light Sleeper
New Member
Yes usually its the women making herself "available". As in life so in dance ...
Sigh.
I'm in a bit of a funk about male/female relations at present. I so hate that word 'available' ... I'm having a feminist, polemic moment... why can't she be 'searching'?
.. Lui describes men and women using non-verbal cues to get dances... but note how the woman has to compete...
... but it will ever be thus when female dancers outnumber male dancers..
bordertangoman
Well-Known Member
Slight Leeper, isnt that why they need codes in the first place... to try and control behaviour; whereas for us self contained brits go to let our hair down; we dont want codes, we want to dance with whomever we please, (and the prettier the better!)
Captain Jep
Active Member
Maybe!
But from a male perspective it still seems to be the case that women dont actually do much "searching". They wait for the man to make the approach. And that's regardless of the numbers against them.*Sigh* hehehe
opendoor
Forum Master
I remember in this context: "women are the only prey that attack..."
Lui
Active Member
OK, let’s be polemic:
The honor of a milonguero is to give any woman the best possible dance, to make her feel and look good without any regards of age, appearance and skill … and to proof this several times a night.
If I had to choose ...
...sounds like a recipe for a pretty uncomfortable milonga for me. Older wealthy guys trying to get a hold on young chicks. Young chicks looking for an evening for free. Both groups in total disregard of the beauty of dance, annoying everybody else! The concept of “self contained brits“ will make excellent female dancers older than 50, (here in Berlin 30) sit around all night and quench the desire to perfect their dancing skills in young male dancers. The result: push and shove on the dance floor, frustration at the tables.
The honor of a milonguero is to give any woman the best possible dance, to make her feel and look good without any regards of age, appearance and skill … and to proof this several times a night.
If I had to choose ...
bordertangoman
Well-Known Member
OK, let’s be polemic:
The honor of a milonguero is to give any woman the best possible dance, to make her feel and look good without any regards of age, appearance and skill … and to proof this several times a night.
If I had to choose ...
in the proverbial porcine aural orifice; milongueros choose who they dance with.
I his a henglish gentlemen and I will dance with any old slapper I mean lady.