Why some women are not asked to dance

Well, it _should_ come from there - non-blind people tend to "cheat" and use their vision instead. (or more generously: as humans we have a lot of overlapping and redundant systems to manage our body in space - another fascinating example is depth perception - actual stereo vision accounts for only a tiny percentage of it, while things like color gradient, relationship with the horizon, relative size, overlap and so on are much more important, even though they are technically not depth perception at all (though it is probably a good thing- movies would be really confusing if actual depth perception was more important))

Similarly I think as dancers this is one of the big problems in learning (and teaching) - in general we see how a movement looks, and then recreate the look, and then bootstrap ourselves into an idea what the alignments and muscles and balance might underlie this. Just like balance we don't have a good way to communicate internal perceptions. Some of my most helpful lessons were lessons where my teacher danced with my partner, and i shadowed him with my hands on his back and waist and spine to be able to feel what and how he actually moved.
 
Well, it _should_ come from there - non-blind people tend to "cheat" and use their vision instead.
It comes from there, but you employ other senses as well. As you age the vestibular functions deteriorate - either the nerve communication or the sensory parts which give that nerve function (basically noise from life, and just ageing), which is why balance is an indicator of aging. As it deteriorates you use other senses - vision to keep an object in position, muscle control (holding something).

It doesn't matter; it's just a feature of ageing and how you adjust.
 
, and I don't regularly practice standing on one foot with my eyes closed. Although perhaps I should start.
Yesterday I tried balancing on one foot. With eyes open, it was easy. I tried swinging my free leg in all directions and speeds, same with arms, and could maintain the balance within as long as I didn’t cause change to my center of gravity.

With eyes close it was different. I tried closing eyes after keeping them open for a few seconds. That helped. Other thing which helped was simply touching the tip of finger to the wall or on top of chair. That wasn’tt wasn’t providing any support. Free standing on one leg a few times with eyes closed started improving the leggy of time I could hold the balance. I never tried that in my twenties. Don’t have a point of reference to compare. Something about visibility appears to help with sense of balance.

Not surprising, on one side it worked better than the other side.

In my early twenties I remember I could put on shoes/socks and tying the laces on the free leg while standing on one leg like a second nature. In those days people were required to remove shoes before entering computer labs. So it was frequent during the day. Thirty years later when changing shoes for dancing, I started noticing that single stability and balance is little wobbly.
 
We use three major sources of information when it comes to balance/body position.

Visual - used to determine how our body parts are arranged (see fake hand experiments) and our position is space in relation to anchors. (Horizon line, room edges, objects)

The inner ear - used to determine the relationship of the head in relation to Earth's gravity and acceleration/deceleration

Information from body articulations - this is sent whenever a movement is sensed in a body articulations. It appears that the information is very short lived as the moment you stop moving you stop receiving information

The brain evaluates these sources all the time and decides what information to trust when there's conflicting information.

The brain hates wasting resources.

As time passes, the visual cortex becomes an implicit trusted sense (You can get dizzy by seeing a video of being in a carousel ride) which leads to the neglect of the other two, because maintaining them uses resources.

To determine how much error is there in the articulation sensory system I use an exercise like:
- chose a ciclic pattern of steps
- perform the steps 3-4 times with eyes open
- perform the steps 9-10 times with the eyes covered
- most likely then not there will be a difference between the expected position and the actual position
By changing the steps of the exercise you can determine the axis and the direction where you have an issue.
The number of repetitions with the eyes closed is basically like a counter on how much you want to zoom in. Zoom in enough times, you'll eventually find something.

For example, one of the major things I've discovered is that when doing enough side steps (left right left right...) I would end up with a counter clockwise rotation of about 4 degrees per cicle. (Eyes were covered to prevent ambient light going through the eyelids, and listening to music to prevent echo location)

So in the end when it comes to senses it appears to be 'use it or lose it'. I knew a guy mechanical clock repairman that died at 90. Until he died the eye that he worked with, he had perfect vision, better then me at 28 at the time. With the other eye he could barely see. So there's hope! :)

Ps. He worked until he died
 
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Data point: I danced 14 tandas last night, and while everyone I danced with had "inner beauty," none were camera-beautiful or young. I specifically avoided a gaggle of young, pretty girls who were trying to get me to invite them because not one of them could keep her feet on the ground. The place was crowded due to a visiting teacher, and I had no desire to apologize for unled kicks three times per tango. Instead I danced with people in their 50s like me, on up to one in her 80s, because they were trying to dance well, not show off long legs, short skirts, and attitudes.

Data point: Two nights ago, I danced 12 or 13 tandas and did the exact same thing. Okay, one partner was much younger than me (I know her and know her age), but that was it. It was even more crowded and the people there were even more into showing off.

I suspect that how crowded and navigationally challenging the milonga is affects who you pick to dance with. Younger, more exuberant partners are difficult at densely packed events. People who through skill won't get heels high in the air in such an environment, or through age are experienced enough (or I guess not flexible enough) to do so, are preferable partners there.

Which isn't to say I "reverse discriminate" against youth and beauty. When the milonga is slow, I totally will dance with people who have crazy legs. I have a few younger partners who are fun that way. But I never ask them to dance when I'm going to move all of two metres during an entire tanda, in a room packed three lanes deep.
I am a bit disheartened by your comment. So, as a Leader you can change your leading style and size of the steps based on the Milonga, yet you have no trust in young Followers to adjust their way of dancing, right? You sound as though we, Followers, are so dumb and can dance only one way or another and have no clue what's going on around us. Yes, I love leg hooks, and ganchos, and body wraps and all crazy moves that boys can through at me if it is appropriate and space permits, yet I equally enjoy moving very little being in close embrace and share moment of joy with my dance partner at a crowded Milonga. And it hurts to know that wonderful people like you will never give me a chance at a crowded Milonga. Followers can change their style of dancing as well. Perhaps, you have to trust us more....
 
I am a bit disheartened by your comment. So, as a Leader you can change your leading style and size of the steps based on the Milonga, yet you have no trust in young Followers to adjust their way of dancing, right? You sound as though we, Followers, are so dumb and can dance only one way or another and have no clue what's going on around us. Yes, I love leg hooks, and ganchos, and body wraps and all crazy moves that boys can through at me if it is appropriate and space permits, yet I equally enjoy moving very little being in close embrace and share moment of joy with my dance partner at a crowded Milonga. And it hurts to know that wonderful people like you will never give me a chance at a crowded Milonga. Followers can change their style of dancing as well. Perhaps, you have to trust us more....
I do trust followers a great deal! However, my personal context is that of a dancer who doesn't travel much at all and knows a specific community – and within that, particular milongas – quite well. There are a three or four styles of tango danced here, and the people who dance the larger, more aerial style really don't tone it down, ever, for anyone. I was at a place just this past Tuesday with about 60 people in a tiny room, and I was kicked several times by people dancing that way and not being led in those movements (I know the leaders, too . . .). The same people did it again on Wednesday. I just don't want to be responsible for that.

When I see new people, I don't have a bias for or against them. I trust them. I'm really talking specifically about people I know and have reason not to want to take risks with.
 
I do trust followers a great deal! However, my personal context is that of a dancer who doesn't travel much at all and knows a specific community – and within that, particular milongas – quite well. There are a three or four styles of tango danced here, and the people who dance the larger, more aerial style really don't tone it down, ever, for anyone. I was at a place just this past Tuesday with about 60 people in a tiny room, and I was kicked several times by people dancing that way and not being led in those movements (I know the leaders, too . . .). The same people did it again on Wednesday. I just don't want to be responsible for that.

When I see new people, I don't have a bias for or against them. I trust them. I'm really talking specifically about people I know and have reason not to want to take risks with.
Thank you. I understand your motives now. :)
 
We all have our prefered style of dancing - the way we enjoy moving the most, feel the best... But I have to admit that I am grateful to be born into this world as a Follower. I truly enjoy majority of the time the game of sensing my partner - his way of leading, his musicality. It's like tring to play with the radio (leaders please do not feel offended for such a comparison) and trying to discover the wave length he operates on the best. Then you try to get on the same wave length and get the musical conversation going. I love it! I cannot get enough of Argentine Tango. Different music and leading styles - making each and every Tanda a truly unique experience. Actually even change of mood can make the same leader lead differently on some occasions. And I know that those who lead very actively at the start of Milonga might become quite chilled and relaxed at the end. :) Whenever I dance at a new Milonga with a total stranger I also like those Leaders who do not through their all repertoire at you at once to impress you. I like how the Leader starts simply walking with you and bit by bit discover your level of ability and allows you to discover his leading abilities as well. Of course it is my own experience. We all differ. Some prefer to dance only with one dance partner and do not like surprises which is totally fine. Dancing should bring joy into your life. That's all that's matter. Some dance to remember. Some dance to forget ...
 
Whenever I dance at a new Milonga with a total stranger I also like those Leaders who do not through their all repertoire at you at once to impress you. I like how the Leader starts simply walking with you and bit by bit discover your level of ability and allows you to discover his leading abilities as well.
Well put. It's a conversation after all. And when you're really in sync and going with the flow of the music, you're dancing as one. I'm not thinking about me or her; it's just us. That's the high point for me.
 
I already have a lot of partners that I enjoy dancing with so I want to be loyal to them as I have known them for a long time. I do sometimes dance with new people, but I do feel I should have the right to be selective, whether that be because they appear to dance well or even I find them attractive, and close to my age.

I also think that when someone is new to a dancing venue or even new to dancing, it is perfectly normal for them to require time to make friends. I don't feel like it is my job to always be an ambassador, but sometimes I will serve that role. But it is also not my responsibility to do that.
 

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